Now that it's all over and the presents have been raided by rover, any type of food they go for, seen that time and time again at my shore. Quite funny thinking about it now even though then one might have a cow. Anyway, what is with this song? It just makes the whole two days we get seem so wrong.
It says we get twelve days of Christmas each and every year. But twelve days never comes near. After two it's back to the grind for all and my little rhyming behind. I think those damn turtle doves messed it up for all of us. Or maybe those french hens just like to cuss. So the world agreed not to go past two when Christmas comes due.
Who wants all that crap anyway? Couldn't they make it something fun for ones bay? I mean all that noise sure isn't wanted by girls and boys. The cat would surely take that pipe and make those pipers have a gripe. Of course if they passed gas later on, I suppose they would still make noise at my lawn.
The rest is all birds and a bunch of overacted words. Do they really need to emphasize five rings, each and every time one sings? Why would a true love send any of this? Is there anyone who all of this crap would give bliss?
The drumming drummers need a smack with their stick.
The lords a leaping can be stopped with a good kick.
The pipers I already said what they can do.
But again they can shove the pipe up their gazoo.
Ladies dancing is kind of strange.
What happens if the sending true love is male on your range?
Would a woman really want to see ladies dancing?
Even if they were prancing?
Maids milking, I take it to be cows.
Would surely raise some eyebrows.
Swans swimming would freeze on the lake,
And they would look so fake.
Geese laying eggs would probably give a honk.
Making their head you just want to conk.
Five golden rings?
Hmmm does that mean you can have four other flings?
The promiscuous might like that.
Just think of five true loves sending all of that crap to your mat.
Calling birds would never shut up.
French hens and their language barrier would be a hiccup.
Well Strat! I think I answered my own questions today.
On why only two days of the twelve ever display.
It is because the rest are total crap. The turtles doves are a nice sight to see as away they fly with a wing flap. The partridge makes a yummy dinner I hear and the pear tree will give you fruit throughout most of the year. So two days are all we get each Christmas time because they rest would make people go crazy and commit an inhumane crime.
I think you'd still get thrown in jail for killing drummers and pipers as they wail. Think if we change the stuff these whacko lovers send we can start a twelve day trend? Just make it more dVerse and then twelve days off will be our blessing or our curse. Yeah, wishful thinking I know, which only means back to the grind we all go. Why did this song even have to come to pass? Oh well, at least it let some sass come from my little rhyming ass.
Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.
It says we get twelve days of Christmas each and every year. But twelve days never comes near. After two it's back to the grind for all and my little rhyming behind. I think those damn turtle doves messed it up for all of us. Or maybe those french hens just like to cuss. So the world agreed not to go past two when Christmas comes due.
Who wants all that crap anyway? Couldn't they make it something fun for ones bay? I mean all that noise sure isn't wanted by girls and boys. The cat would surely take that pipe and make those pipers have a gripe. Of course if they passed gas later on, I suppose they would still make noise at my lawn.
The rest is all birds and a bunch of overacted words. Do they really need to emphasize five rings, each and every time one sings? Why would a true love send any of this? Is there anyone who all of this crap would give bliss?
The drumming drummers need a smack with their stick.
The lords a leaping can be stopped with a good kick.
The pipers I already said what they can do.
But again they can shove the pipe up their gazoo.
Ladies dancing is kind of strange.
What happens if the sending true love is male on your range?
Would a woman really want to see ladies dancing?
Even if they were prancing?
Maids milking, I take it to be cows.
Would surely raise some eyebrows.
Swans swimming would freeze on the lake,
And they would look so fake.
Geese laying eggs would probably give a honk.
Making their head you just want to conk.
Five golden rings?
Hmmm does that mean you can have four other flings?
The promiscuous might like that.
Just think of five true loves sending all of that crap to your mat.
Calling birds would never shut up.
French hens and their language barrier would be a hiccup.
Well Strat! I think I answered my own questions today.
On why only two days of the twelve ever display.
It is because the rest are total crap. The turtles doves are a nice sight to see as away they fly with a wing flap. The partridge makes a yummy dinner I hear and the pear tree will give you fruit throughout most of the year. So two days are all we get each Christmas time because they rest would make people go crazy and commit an inhumane crime.
I think you'd still get thrown in jail for killing drummers and pipers as they wail. Think if we change the stuff these whacko lovers send we can start a twelve day trend? Just make it more dVerse and then twelve days off will be our blessing or our curse. Yeah, wishful thinking I know, which only means back to the grind we all go. Why did this song even have to come to pass? Oh well, at least it let some sass come from my little rhyming ass.
Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.
Orlin, you've outdone yourself! Can't wait to see all the gushy -- and well-deserved -- comments on this one! Fantastic. (And you know I'm not the gushy type.)
ReplyDeleteDearest cat, well for the next Christmas come here baby, we have only two Christmas day, and is all and of course the week before is absolutely crazy:)
ReplyDeleteThis is a nice and interesting post:)
damn turtle doves. Them and meerkats are always scheming something with armadilo gang!
ReplyDelete12 days of christmas would be nice...although i guess i get 9 and thats good enough
ReplyDeleteDo they really need to emphasize five rings, each and every time one sings?
ReplyDeletehahahaha. That was my favorite line. :)
The parts of the song about birds are fine with me
but 9 cats a mewing
would have been more ensuing
or 15 if they sang to you, Pat
seeing as that's where you're at.
A redo with the cats in mind
would be really sublime.
Maybe after my coffee is drank
and I my contacts in my eyes have sank
I'll give that a little whirl
just promise me you won't dance and twirl.
haha.
oh, the grammar nazi is having a fit
not liking my writing not one bit.
ha.
Excellent writing as always buddy, reading this has helped closed my mind off and make me realise Christmas is now well and truly over. 12 days would be awesome, especially if they were DVerse but what can we do?
ReplyDeleteLOL!!!! I think you should make up your own version of the song. You're right tho...why the hell would you send someone maid's milking?? Milk scares me. Bleh....
ReplyDeleteI'll take the 5 golden rings tho. Gold is worth a lot right now. :)
It would be cooler if you can sing this Christmas song..ha..ha...Yes, this is what my true love said to me ~
ReplyDeletehaha wow got big props from the Fox
ReplyDeleteHere at my docks
See all you "sweet" people out there
That's how it's one without a sweet or dear at his or my lair..haha
The cat might unravel
If he has to travel
Did that once before
When he came to my shore
Was not happy
But was really flappy
Yeah and those damn penguins too
You can't forget about them and their smelly poo
True, being in school and such
You do tend to get much
hahaha that line popped in as I went through the song
Emphasizing everytime makes one seem like a ding dong..haha
True doing it with cats would be fun
Look an idea for you I have spun
There is a new blog post for you
Make sure you make it rhyme too..haha
hahaha okay no dancing or twirling with be had
Not be the cat, miss priss or that Pat lad
Grammar Nazi isn't against your beat
Not thinking sweet is neat..haha
Yeah I tried to do one that says it's over and done
Back to the normal non-christmas fun
Not sure what 12 things one could do
Guess it would be up to each person what would ensue
Next year I'll keep in mind
To make up my own version with my little rhyming behind
Maid's a milking is like the dumbest one
Milk doesn't scare me but is nasty and here it is never run
True five golden rings might get you some dough
So that is something I wouldn't mind either at my show
hahaha well there you go
Just sing with it's usual flow
And off the hook you are
From sending all that crap to your bar
wow you sure wrecked the 12 days....surprised you dont go bowling with elves today...have you heard what it would cost they say each year to bring this kind of christmas cheer? better start playing the lottery...
ReplyDeletebecause SCREW Christmas :)
ReplyDeleteThey're totally wrong but many people say
ReplyDeletethe lords -a-leapin' are totally gay.
But, even if they were, that's completely unsat
'Cause it's not like there's anything wrong with that.
Happy New Year!
My printer is relatively new. I'm in no mood for smashing. I wonder if my son threw out the old one. I wouldn't mind smashing that. I tried to change the ink cartridge in it and a tiny piece broke off, causing irreparable damage.
ReplyDeleteIf Christmas was indeed 12 days long it would have been too boring. 2 days is just enough to feel and enjoy the holiday spirit
ReplyDeletehaha bowling with elves would be fun
ReplyDeleteGetting a strike and watching them fall and run
Never heard what is would cost though
But then lottery prob isn't a good way to go
Screw those twelve days indeed
Who knows where they will lead
Yeah nothing wrong with that
If they have a leapin' door mat
Or like to jump and cheer
This or that to Happy New Year
haha yeah go for the old one
Have some fun
And smash the thing to bits
Because sounds like it is the pits
I'm sure I can fill the 12 days with something to do
But many would find it hard to
Raided by rover lol reminds my of my uncles dog he'll gently unwrap presents then take them out of the box. Some dogs think they're humans
ReplyDeletehaha - think i wouldn't survive much more than two days of christmas madness..so better back to grind than in prison..smiles
ReplyDeleteGuess what Cat, I get twelve days!
ReplyDeleteTo poetize and have my say,
But on the third I shall return
Ready to take that work and burn
And the third is great if I do say
as it is also my birthday
So even though I may get to play
at being a poet for the next few days
Think of me while your at work
Going back on your birthday can be a jerk! :(
Hope you had some Christmas Cheer
With lots of paper to rip and tear
As always here is where it's at
And that dear readers is a face it fact!
This could be another awesome book trailer. I LOVE it LOL!
ReplyDeleteNooo, no killing drummers!
ReplyDeleteI'm with D4 on the drummers, never kill a drummer, never ever kill drummers. You may however kill the rest and I'll help the cat with that. Hubby hates this bleeding song so he'd love to read this. Maybe the maids a milking were lactating (gross, I know).
ReplyDeleteHaha, the partridges would make a great meal-lol Love your take on this theme. The rundown had me cracking up, and now that I actually think about it, really only 2 days are of importance, the rest are exactly what you said, wow to think that thought was never heard, I think the turtle doves are going to be awfully perturbed, if not them then the drummers might. Great write.
ReplyDeleteGreat writing :)
ReplyDeleteFollowing!
Nice writing. :D
ReplyDelete4 other flings? LOL. Your mind is one of a kind.
ReplyDeleteDid you know I was actually a milk maid back on my Daddy's farm? yep. Well, kinda. Sorta. I did milk one of his cows once!!
And guess what? I think you are now 4th in line for a Jannie Sidebar Button.
whoohoo?? :0 ;0
xo
Hard to enjoy winter; but easier since we have no snow yet. As far as smashing a printer, no way. I just got hime working. And, oh, no calling birds for me either. What the heck are they anyway? Happy New Year to You, my Friend.
ReplyDeletehaha yeah I've had one that was sneaky as can be
ReplyDeleteAnother would just go in no matter who was around to see
They do think they are human at times
But none of them can send out the rhymes..haha
So true
Better back to the grind then in prison feeling blue
Or orange I guess
Either way be one big mess
Technically I'm not back to work
So I can sit home and lurk
I will lay around and be a lazy cat
As usual, except now so will Pat
Sucks about Birthday and working
Not sure if this year I will or just be lurking
But either way
Sounds like there will be little dismay
As fun will prob be had
And all will be glad
hahaha I'd have to write the book for it
Already have too many to write at my pit
hahaha I just said I'd smack them with their stick
Killing is just so umm ick
Ewwwww not that is nasty indeed
Lactating maids would make one take heed
No, no drummers were harmed in the making of this rhyme
They are all still drumming away in their prime..haha
Yeah the rest seem like total crap
I guess they just needed something to flap
To fill their stupid gap
Because only two days wouldn't be a very long rap
So they made up a bunch of junk
That no one would think was a slamdunk
Thanks for that
From the cat
Nice one can say
It seems all day
haha well 4 flings
With five rings
One woul be legit and all
The rest would be a fake marriage call
Once wow!
Way to go with that cow..haha
And a button tooo
Whoohoo
Yeah winter blows
Even more when it snows
Smash one it is fun
Better yet smash a ton..haha
Yeah enough with the stupid birds
All of them would sure drop some turds
Happy New Year back
From all at the cat's shack
And passing gas is the very reason why we do not have Brussel sprouts for our Christmas dinner. LOL
ReplyDeleteThere's enough hot air in here without adding to it.
Hope yours was a good one Pat ;)
hahaha yes plenty of hot air
ReplyDeleteHere, there and everywhere
At bush number three
And it was good at my sea
Dude I love your background! You've got the whole world, in your hands!
ReplyDeleteI never got that 12 day thing
ReplyDeleteTwo makes more sense and
Has a better ring
But we're still stuck with the partridge
and pear tree too
Though it sure beats pipers with pipes up their gazoo.
Hope your Christmas was a great two (days).
xoRobyn
haha just don't go singing that song
ReplyDeleteThen we may not get along..haha
Yeah I guess some nut just want to make it twelve days
And so came up with some crazy displays
On what it should be
I guess at least one person gets some glee
Out of pipers
Maybe they were in diapers
the pipers can do what you said you said
ReplyDeleteswans won't look as fake as a snake
the promiscuous just might like that
for i am momentarily in rhyme heaven
courtesy of mr. hatt
Wow... I think those 12 days are hidden somewhere inside the 3 months leading up it. I know there's a back story to that song, I'm just too comatose after two days of Christmas to go find it.
ReplyDeleteI think getting five rings means you get five wives! But that might not be a good thing!
ReplyDelete12 days of Christmas cheer
ReplyDeleteWill bore many I'm sure
2 days is enough time to kill
Lots of chores to fulfill
Hank
"Bah, Humbug," I say
ReplyDeleteIt's enough with one day.
Pat, be of good cheer:
Wish the cat "Happy New Year!"
LOL... too funny... my fav-to-date... you missed my rhyme this week... actually had some
ReplyDeleteIt's a hit that's lit
ReplyDeletehahaha glad you agree with the piper one
ReplyDeleteThat would be such fun
And I sent you to rhyme heaven you say
That is fun to hear at my bay
True could be hidden about
As the song gives its crazy shout
Yeah I was too lazy to look too
But I'm sure something made it come due
Yeah would be tricky to balance five wives
Especially with five bee hives
Yeah 12 days would bore some
But not my little rhyming bum
As I find something to do
Just rhyme for all of you
I'll sent to cat your wish
Even if a bah humbug you dish..haha
I didn't miss
I was just slow give xmas a hiss
Fav to date you say
This one just popped in the other day
Glad it's a hit
And didn't cause a fit
very entertaining - my fav is Five golden rings?
ReplyDeleteHmmm does that mean you can have four other flings? lol!
hahaha those flings might become aware
ReplyDeleteAnd then it's cheaters beware
I see you're still having as much fun as ever hear at your place, and I'm with Sheila on my favorite part. Nice to visit again :)
ReplyDeleteOh yes fun is still being had
ReplyDeletehaha that part, I fear for many a lass and lad..haha
Oh I enjoyed this one very much... lovely.
ReplyDeletethanks for sharing... Happy New Year My friend. May the year bring you Happiness, Peace, love and prosperity.
Shashi
ॐ नमः शिवाय
Om Namah Shivaya
http://shadowdancingwithmind.blogspot.com/2011/12/whisper-no-one-is-there-in-living-haiku.html
At Twitter @VerseEveryDay
you have taken over the world, and the printer business is never better.
ReplyDeleteGlad it was enjoyed very much
ReplyDeleteAnd not just a touch
Will always share
Sometimes one should beware
hahaha damn I'm helping those big wigs get more money
I should get a kickback so I can move somewhere sunny
Just the rewrite it needed! Truly masterful my friend! My best to you and yours this coming year! ~ Rose
ReplyDeleteJust came back to read once more...I just loved your 12 Days of Christmas. So much to LOL about. Loved the 5 golden rings, so four additional flings. Your mind is way cool!
ReplyDeleteMasterful it was you say
ReplyDeleteThat is nice to hear at my bay
Best to you as well
When the new years rings in with its bell
hahahaha you know it's good when you get people reading twice
Saying my mind is cool is always way nice
Hope I didn't LOL you out just yet
More to come in 2012 on that you can bet