Screw You Rover. We're Taking Over!

So you know the cat rules all,
Here at his stall.
He also gives Canada a bad name,
For not being so tame.

But it seems those close by,
Also want to give cat ruling a try.
Mayor Stubbs sits above,
Showing a small Alaskian town some love.

For 15 years he has ruled the town,
With his iron claw and crown.
Cats are taking over in politics and rhyme.
And it's about time!

Next it will be sports,
We'll jump all over your courts.
Put little balls in little holes,
Which you think are lofty goals.

Even make movies with humans on a leash,
As we sit and eat quiche.
It will just show what is to come.
Of course all will be led by my little rhyming bum.

You can't beat the cat,
If you try you'll be squashed flat.
Put in a zoo,
For all the animals to view.

That would serve you right.
As you are an attraction during the daylight.
Sleeping on the ground at night.
Oh what a sight!

But if some are brave,
They can have their very own cave.
Of course they have to be a litterbox cleaning slave.
On command, whenever we wave.

So from attractions to slaves,
As we throw raves.
Leaving you all behind,
Aren't we ever so kind?

And it started with a mayor and rhyming cat.
How about that?
But in the end,
You can still get a good butt sniffing from man's best friend.

Yep, he really did get voted in and secured the win. It seems no one like who was running so they pulled a Brewster's Millions and were shunning. Voting for none of the above and showing a cat love. Isn't that grand? A cat now rules some Alaskian land. Bet he has some nice litterbox grass. Maybe even a bush with a tush like my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.


  1. I love this as always Pat, hopefully that cat can overthrow those dogs who walk around like they are Gods!

    1. Pffft dogs have no chance
      I'll get them when they lift their leg and take a stance

  2. A Cat as mayor
    You have your lore
    Good to adore
    Not to abhor
    Or not to bother


    1. A myth I would guess
      Or something less
      But it is true
      He is the mayor that came due

  3. That cat will meet its match
    when I throw in my catch
    and swoops in my little hawk
    , scaring the cat, making it go

    1. Pffft you will get attacked
      And maybe even whacked
      By it's body guard
      And thrown across the yard

  4. But you can't walk a cat
    they don't appreciate that
    they don't easily learn tricks
    and they can't fetch sticks
    It's dogs that suit me
    that's why I have three
    anyway cats make me sneeze
    my eyes water and I wheeze
    Cats are okay
    for someone else's bay
    that's all I can say
    besides have a great day!

    1. haha depends on the cat
      For a savannah can do all of that
      With ease
      And walk where ever you please
      Even fetch its toys too
      Plays in the bathtub also for all to view

  5. A cat could never be mayor!!! Rhyming or not, it just won't work. You see, cats make certain people sneeze ;) lol

    1. Well the cat is mayor
      Sure he's quite the player
      This one is not
      And at least he'd scare away the crazies by making them sneeze a whole lot

  6. i wonder how long it is before a cat is elected in the states putting the brakes on the wahoos we got running now, or maybe a cow since they like to milk it for all it is worth and rake the earth, but this is about cats, which are cool, we have two that rule our roost...

    1. Yeah it would be better I'd say
      Then those crap politicians at play
      But then your cow would do a better job
      As they wouldn't tax to death and rob

  7. Well good for that cat
    he'll make a great mayor I bet
    Better than some human politicians
    who only have selfish intentions.
    Probably be the best governed town
    all around.

    1. Yeah shows what happens when no good ones run
      The cat gets all the fun
      And the rest get the shaft
      Send up river on a raft
      My that would hurt the ego a bit
      Losing an election to a cat proves you are a twit

    2. yep, the egos would be bruised
      as they realized they loosed.
      oops...hope the grammar nazi doesn't see
      the way I rhymed that line, for thee. ha.
      I bet the stray cats from all around
      journey to that cat mayor's town.

    3. Yeah they prob have quite the home
      Where such a mayor does roam
      And Grammar Nazi is far away
      So no chance he'll catch your loosed at my bay haha

    4. very true...I can say loosed all I want
      and he won't even have a hunch. lol...

      Maybe Orlin could run for mayor of Halifax
      just post it on the Face It Facts!

    5. LOL well the mayor is coming due
      At least I'm 95% sure that is true
      So maybe he could
      And he prob should
      But that would take time
      Away from the rhyme

    6. No, it would bring the whole city in for your chime!

    7. You could offer incentives like follow my blog and get 1% off of your local taxes! lol...

    8. LOL damn that would get me tons of views
      With that idea how could I lose

    9. you need me cat
      ...another face it fact.

    10. LOL I agree
      With the fact about thee

  8. I suppose a cat as a mayor
    will probably just ignore you

    1. haha and let you do want your want
      Maybe once in a while taunt

  9. Screw you, Rover?
    Hmm...when thinking it over.
    May not be so hot.
    'Cause when do it
    and actually screw it.
    Legal? I think not.

    1. Yeah might be up the creek
      Maybe play hide and seek
      Better for your health
      Or at least gives you some stealth

  10. I see cats ruling the world soon enough. Lol

  11. Maybe in my next life, I'll come back as a cat and rule our little about that ;)

    1. Well that you can do
      As by that time I'm sure there won't be many there to oppose you hahaha

  12. Leave it the land of ice and snow.
    What do those people know?
    It's way to cold for them to understand.
    They need to live by much warmer sands.
    Besides, cats are never loyal
    that's why dogs are always royal

    1. Pfft cats are loyal to some
      You just make them glum
      With your one whole eye
      They shout oh my
      And take off for the hills
      Where dogs see it and get thrills hahaha

    2. My TWO eyes stare cats down
      and run them all out of town
      While all the dogs run and play
      because I've chased the cats away

    3. Well I agree you can chase them away
      With your scary display
      That playdough eye you add
      Would scare even the bravest lad

    4. Of cats and dogs
      I have both
      and though dogs
      like to boast,
      it's cat's that
      rule and
      get there way
      each and every day.

    5. Wait, what?! Did Anne just disagree with the General??? LOL

    6. See Anne agrees with me
      You are shit out of luck you see
      For even your own alliance
      Shows defiance hahahaha

  13. Move over Harper here comes the cat

    1. That would be too funny
      Although I might save your money

  14. As witty as ever, Pat! Glad to be back home, and read your words.

    1. Hope you had a good trip
      And glad your back as I continue to give lip

  15. Kind of makes you wonder how the cat approves a budget.

    Two meows means it passes.

    One meow means its rejected.

    Hacking up a hairball means give me some tuna and lets get the heck out of here.

    1. hahaha well at least it cuts through the crap
      And everyone can go home early for a nap

  16. Hmmm. I think Schultz might have a thing or two to say about cats ruling the land. (But he might agree that a human on a leash is something quite grand.)

    1. The cat would just throw him a troll
      Then he'd be more than happy to take a human for a stroll

  17. Well is your land; your rules; your cat; so is ok lol

    1. Glad you agree
      And no oh dear came out of thee haha

  18. I love my dogs and cats equally, but I have to be honest, thke e cats rule the roost. Fang put all three dogs in their place on her first day here. One swipe at the nose, a hiss, ears back and the dogs knew she was queen of all she surveyed. The indoor cats rule the house as well. The dogs just let them have their way. My dogs were trained by cats just like me.

    A cat as Mayor, it couldn't have been any worse than having Arnold Shwarenegger as governor of California.

    1. Yeah both are just as great in Pat's book
      But the cat would have something to say about that with a dirty look
      Cat's do rule and put them in their place
      One simple whack to the face
      And they know who's boss
      The mutts are at a lose
      And I suppose that is true
      Way better than the terminator in job and view

  19. Yeah... I think if cats were elected in a lot more places things would be A LOT better overall.

    At least in a zoo you're guaranteed to have food and shelter which is more than some people have.

    1. Yeah that is very true
      They wouldn't have some self serving agenda to push through

  20. Interesting take on Mayor Stubbs,
    who knew the cat will rule the club
    Maybe I will go down to the pub
    and watch the show with a tiger cub

    Have a good night Pat :-)

    1. haha just watch their paws
      They have sharp claws
      Might turn into Jaws
      Who has some flaws

  21. I know my cats rule my abode. Sad, very sad.


  22. Wow, that's hilarious, I remember when Morris the cat received quite a bit of write in votes many elections ago and always thought it would be awesome if he would've won. Can't believe this cat's a mayor, mice beware, catnip will be everywhere, in the grass and hanging from the trees, birds will go south for the summer and stay there for the winter too. Can't wait for his first press conference, hopefully he'll meow really loud then jump off the stage, and chase some sleddogs away from him. Perhaps the cat will be next in line, to win the NS election some time. Can't say it could never happen now, I bet all the dogs are having a cow.

    The planet of the apes angle you fed in here was a nice touch as well. Fun piece.

    1. LOL yeah you never know
      Could win the election at my show
      Then boss everyone around
      Not just Pat and some weiner hound
      Planet of the apes popped in
      Cats would be better than those for the win

  23. only makes sense for cats to takeover
    after all, cats created humans just to have someone to pet them

    1. LOL that is a great theory
      I may have to steal that one day to make thinks more cheery


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