Flappy And The Table. Sadly, This Is Not A Fable!

So after a vacation at work, Pat came back and it did not make him smirk. But that is neither here nor there for Flappy was about to show up at his work lair. He had not seen her in over a month or so, but his hatred was still able to show. For when the make up drenched cow came through the door, he knew more of her stupid arse comments were in store.

"How is your summer so far? That is good, I bet it's been really good. Isn't summer just the best?"

Now ignoring how she just sounded like some blonde beach bimbo from barbie land with that last statement she made, thinking she sounded oh so grand. She did not even give Pat time to speak, which made him just want to throw her off a peak.

"Can I get a bigger table over there? I have an expo and I want to see if it will all fit on the table. You know it would be better if you had a bigger table. Why don't you use a bigger table? Can I get a bigger table?"

Pat wished he could whack her in the head with one and make it hurt a ton. But she might buy the farm and plus it would probably screw up Pat's arm. So he told her no and that they were given away from his work show. Really they were not, but he was going to let her idea rot.

"That is awful. Why would you sell the bigger table?"

As she blabbed on about the table once more, like Pat was in charge of selling them at his work shore. She tried to push two together of the smaller ones and then puckered up like she had to runs.

"I hate these small ones, they don't move. They have wheels but they don't move. Why did you have to switch tables. I just wanted to see if it would fit for my expo. Now I'll have to figure it out on the day. Are you sure you don't have a bigger table anywhere?"

The dunce still didn't know how to unlock the wheel. Getting out of bed in the morning for her must be quite the ordeal. She probably gets lost under the sheet. I bet 6 out of 7 days she suffers defeat.

"Maybe next time you can have a bigger table. Could you let them know I don't like the change? Can you tell them these tables are broken? These tables should move. I liked the bigger tables better. Are you sure there are none around? You need a bigger table."

You would think getting a bigger damn table was like winning the lottery or something. The dunce even let her arms fling. Pat hoped she'd stab herself with her pen. But he was not so lucky at his work den. As in came the rest and she spread her big table desires with such zest.

"Don't you think the big tables were better? I liked it so much better with the big tables. They need to bring those big tables back. Can you believe they sold the big tables?"

I think they got she was talking about big tables the first ten times she said it. But she had to keep saying them with her fit. Over and over and over. Maybe if Pat was lucky she'd get bit by a stray rover. Could get a good lunch with its crunch.

The table talk went on and on and on and on some more. I guess she thought some crowd somewhere far far far away demanded an encore. So make sure you have a big table set up or at least a big scary pup, if Flappy should ever come your way. Do me a favor and keep her at your bay. Or use her for bait to fish for bass. That surely wouldn't bother my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.


  1. so size does matter, what a mad hatter no way will i keep her at my bay i am just saying she would always be braying...

    1. haha yeah I suppose it does
      And Flappy will let it buzz
      Pfft at least you could gawk
      As she kept trying to squawk haha

  2. I see that I'm not the only one who can go on a rant
    and when she asked for a larger table you said, "I can't"
    but if I ever encounter her I at my bay
    it would mean a time for me to play
    because mind games are a fun time for me
    so feel free to send her to my sea ha ha ha

    1. Okay that works for me
      I will send her down to thee
      And then you can rant away
      About how you want her gone from you bay
      The cat will just smile
      For if you think the pringle cans are vile
      She will give you a whole new view
      And you'll be wishing for a pringle can to come due

    2. I'm telling you Cat, Elsie can be vicious. I've hired her to take care of my troll infestation!

    3. Ha ha ha, Anne!! I was hoping your troll would swing by for a bit....but I better be careful what I wish for, huh?

      Pat, Anne got to see a very evil side of me...pringle cans got nothing on me lmao

    4. hahaha oh evil are you
      What that one eye can do
      I suppose the cat will have to up his game
      Or just stop pretending to be tame haha

    5. You may be snip snip Cat, but you're not tame. If you weren't so horrid, you could partner in crime with me and Elsie.

      Stop calling her one eye you foul creature!

    6. hahaha well for the right cause
      The cat could dig in his claws
      Although that would be a one time thing
      For old one eye is scary at her wing hahahahaa

  3. Your story is so adorable, I could read it on and on. What a wonderful tale about a table talk.

    1. Pfft read it on and on
      I want Flappy to go away and never again dawn

  4. ohmy I understand you Patt she is terrible I hate this type of people that agsin and again about the same thing.
    Yes Flappy make me feel exausted :(

    1. haha think of having to deal with her in real life
      Oh the strife
      Same damn thing over and over again
      Don't know anyone can stand her at her den

    2. Yes but in my life I knew some Flappys and go so far..
      you poor boy amazed me she doesnt notice you dont like her LOL

    3. LOL I wish she would notice it
      Then maybe she'll have one last fit
      And go far far away
      Never again coming to my work bay

  5. Some conversations are really annoying to recall.
    This one makes me want to move Flappy into the hall!

    1. Into the hall half way around the earth
      That is a good plan to give birth

  6. Well if she goes on and on like a broken record,
    I will go nuts too ~

    Happy day Pat ~

    1. She good drive all mad
      As a fun time surely isn't had

  7. Nope, you can keep Floppy at your bay, and try to feed her hay. Lol

    1. LOL the wrong vowel there
      But I suppose maybe you are aware
      As she is rather old
      So floppy things are as they aren't so bold hahaha

  8. Oh, I remember the last table dismay
    and the wheels that confused her in many ways.
    But the line that had me howling here
    was that she probably gets lost under her sheet, oh dear!

    LOL! Now that is dense.
    She's lost her 2 cents.
    But she'll keep giving like she has two.
    Oh, poor poor you!

    1. hahaha hope the cats didn't think you were crazy
      As they lie around being lazy
      And your howl came due
      They may think a dog is at your zoo hahaha
      Yeah is is so damn dense
      She'd make a monk tense
      Needs to go the hell away
      But at least this year she booked less nights at my bay

  9. You need a bigger table
    Sadly she was not able
    Had an expo to organize
    Big table would be nice
    Can't they just approve
    Smaller tables can't move
    Have to accept the fact
    Meantime they should act


    1. Yeah and get over her crap
      Of letting her lips flap
      Saying the same thing ten times
      I would rather sit in front of mimes

  10. Hahaha. It can't get more annoying than it already is.

    Coming back to your den after a long time and I like the change. Keep it up, Patt! :D

    1. haha oh she finds a way
      To be more annoying each day
      Glad you like the den too
      And has been a while indeed from you

  11. Sounds like the makeup drenched cow should tone down her look a bit as well as zip her lip.

    1. Yeah that would be grand
      For her I can't stand
      But she never gets the hint
      Maybe her brain has something like window tint

  12. I think she stumbled
    by the table rumble-
    So give her headphone
    with music On
    to get distract her
    and help to move on...

    1. Then she'd prob try to flap louder
      Standing more prouder
      As her damn voice was heard
      She is very absurd

  13. So Flappy
    struck again
    here at your den.

    She filled you
    with dismay
    for overlong
    she stayed.

    To flap, flap, flap
    in such
    a tiresome way.

    I think Elsie and I could handle her Cat. We wouldn't have to take her sass. We'd tell her straight what a bimbo she is and break her arms, her head, her legs.

    1. Well that would work for me
      Just don't let it get back to my work sea
      I need the dough
      Or out into the street I'll go haha

    2. We'd be stealthy-like ninjas. What are you going to do if she ever finds your blog Cat!

    3. No fear of that
      She is too dumb and will prob think it's about some other dingbat

  14. You do make Flappy sound like quite the bimbo haha although she is right Pat, Summer really is the best! She seems quite the nuisance as well as quite the bimbo too, bet she gets on more than just your nerves.

    1. A bimbo is putting it nice
      And I'm sure she even gets on the nerves of mice

  15. pretty annoying i must say. i have no patience with such characters. yikes.

    1. Yeah my patience wears thin
      But I have to stay employed at my work bin

  16. Tell her the better table is the floor

    and for her to use it before you take score

    1. haha that would be grand
      I'll remember that on the next time she shows up at my land

  17. ...and hand her a thimble in which to store her brain.

    1. She'd prob flip her wig
      As that would still be too big haha

  18. I have never seen the word table written so many times before.

    1. Just think off having to hear it said that many times
      Oh the crimes

  19. The bait idea is a good one. And then the cat can eat the bass. It's a win-win for almost all. :D

    1. haha yeah that works for me
      A snack and I can get rid of Flappy

  20. Just throw the woman under the table!

    1. Oh how I wish
      I'd like to slap her with dead fish

  21. Um . . . can I get a bigger table?

    1. If you want it over your head
      Though that might cause dread haha

  22. Oh, wow. Can you get a restraining order?

    1. That would be nice
      I'd hand it to her with dead mice haha

  23. Replies
    1. Yep and so much more
      Wish she'd leave my work shore


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