Take The Pen And Stab The Old Hen!

Pat sooooo has to restrain himself at his work shore when stupid ass Flappy is in store. Yes, she is dumber than a donkey too. She just has no friggin clue. How she even functions in life is beyond me. She certainly swings from the annoying tree.

"I have some dates to book, but where is my pen. My stuff is packed too, do you have any paper?"

Yeah, because I just so happen to carry paper around with me while trying to get your large ass to flee. Just email them in Pat said, but that seemed to go over her head.

"My assist isn't in. I need to find a pen, are you sure you don't have any paper? What about a pen? Do you have a pen?"

What a moron is all I can say. I have to keep the sharp objects away. Or I might stab her in the face. So no I don't have a pen for you to embrace. And an assist too? MY GOD, that person has to be hard up or really really desperate and/or dumb with no clue. First I ever heard of that. Maybe one day I'll theorize at my mat.

"I really need a pen. There has to be a pen. What could I write on? There has to be something here to write on. Are you sure you don't have a pen? What about paper? Know where there is paper?"

How many damn times does she need to hear it? Someone should throw her in some deep dark pit. She needed to get her ass out the door. This nut jub has to take the cake and win some kind of dumbness title of lore.

"Here is a pen. I found a pen. The pen was here. See, here is a pen."

Like she won the damn lottery or she set the poor imprisoned pen free. Whoopdi friggin doo. This nimrod has no clue.

"Now for paper. I could write on this but I need that. That is no good. I need paper. Here is paper. No, that isn't good paper."

The dunce went on like that for a while as Pat muttered something vile. Then she finally found something to write and went on more into the night.

"I want this date and this one and this one."

She booked them and at the same time went over them three friggin times with her chime. Then she did it once more, flipping through the pages of her scheduler thingy, becoming quite the bore.

"Did you get that? Do you need me to repeat it? I could email it to you if you wish?"

That is when Pat had enough and did not care no more for her stupid ass fluff. If the dumbass wanted to email it to me then she could have done so and left me be. Got her fat ass out the door and left my work shore. But oh no had to let all that nonsense flow.

Anyway, Pat told her to take her crap and go. Boy, did her eyes grow. He just opened the door and pointed out. She muttered something and gave a pout. But hey it works for dogs so Pat gave it a try. Maybe she will finally leave now without annoying the poor guy. Doubtful with this stupid lass. She really even annoys the cat's little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.


  1. I love the twist at the end where it turned out it could be emailed to you, this really made me laugh Pat, I hate visitors like that! I can see why this would be annoying, awesome post mate.

    1. Yeah she is a nut
      That has a huge butt
      And needs to go pound sand
      Or get whacked with a big cat stand

  2. haha...please be prepared when you come to my lair, a pen/paper, its not that i am a hater, i just dont want to reward your bad behavior & make you dependant, dont you get it...at least she is the source of endless inspiration, might as well thank her for that donation...happy saturday cat, back at your lair cause that is where its at

    1. If only she would take such a hint
      I think she suffers from brain tint
      As in it is shaded away
      Because there is nothing much there on display

  3. Thinking about Flappy
    inspires you yappy
    which is not so crappy
    and makes readers happy!!
    (Now aren't my words sappy?)

    1. Aren't you sappy
      All about Flappy
      Go take a nappy
      Then give Flappy a good zappy

  4. Replies
    1. Ranting and raving is grand
      Has to come out here and there in my land

  5. I hate it when people come and bother me when things like pen and paper...Emailing is so much easier to do ~

    Wishing you happy weekend ~

    1. Yeah it is faster and easier in every way
      But oh no, that have to bother us each day

  6. Just don't stab the hens in zelda games

    they've put me down in flames

    1. haha avoid their wrath
      Maybe give them a bath

  7. She must be nuts
    An obnoxious soul
    One gets riled up
    Her antics foretold
    She plain forgot
    Email is a good take
    She just would not
    Or just to irritate


    1. Yeah off her rocker
      But that is no shocker
      Hopefully she'll leave soon
      That damn Flappy loon

  8. ha you know..i write on my iphone usually...no pen and paper needed..but i've also written on toilet paper at times....or walls..smiles

    1. Well the iphone works great
      Toilet paper not sure on that fate haha

  9. Creative post! I live the twist and the detail you put into it :)

    Also, I just re-opened my blog and I would really appreciate you checking it out.
    Here's a link to my newest post:



  10. Cat, I think she's flirting with Pat. She just doesn't know how to go about it. She wants him, she wants him bad and she's willing to annoy him just to get his attention. Unlike you Cat, who will suck the fat on your Viking woman with glee. Pat's tastes are more discriminating.

    Tomorrow I'm going to do something completely out of character for me. I'm going to post. Yes, you heard me right, I'm going to write bloody blog and post the damn thing.

    1. haha that old fart
      Has no sense of anything at her cart
      Pat's taste are way better though
      But the viking woman gets it one for the cat with her fatty flow

      About time I will say
      That you blab at your bay

  11. Replies
    1. Yes chicken is grand
      Snacked on all the time at our land

  12. Flappy is dappy and could end up with a slappy?

  13. Haha! It works for dogs! Yeah, but if that didn't work, you could always try sweeping her away. LOL!

    1. haha sweeping away her face
      Would be fun do to with no more flappy trace

  14. At least she is used for our amusement
    Even though she's full of confusement.
    Your posts on her are probably my favorite.
    She needs to wear a pen like a bracelet!
    The best by far is the table on wheels.
    the fact that she didn't get it was surreal!

    1. Get such a thrill
      From a Flappy fill
      That is sad
      What happens when I leave or she leaves my work pad?
      Then no more of her crap
      Will take a lap
      Too bad so sad
      Better times will be had

    2. Oh, you're probably stuck with her forever
      unless you take another employment endeavor.
      But there's a flappy at every station
      to cause you some inflammation.

    3. That is very true
      A new Flappy would come due
      Maybe I'll win the lotto soon
      And not have to deal with a new or old Flappy loon

    4. I hope that's true
      and I hope you do!
      Make sure you play #5
      for my zoo and the your bush hive.

    5. haha well 50 million is up soon
      If that is won by this loon
      I may have to share
      After I find hide at a new lair

    6. Wouldn't that be fun!
      I wish you lots of luck on that one!

    7. haha let hope the luck comes my way
      Then no more work bay

  15. We likes your rhyme
    But even for a dime
    We can't tell who is who
    In your wacky little zoo
    We guess some are for real
    But others we've begun to feel
    Are just your alter egos
    Our confusion grows and grows!

    1. Sometimes it is alter egos
      But who really knows
      As the cat is the one
      That rhymes with fun
      While Miss Priss is around
      But there is no hound

  16. I'm convinced that you rhyme even while you sleep. LOL!

    1. haha sometimes I do
      Which is strange between me and you

  17. I still like my post it notes too. And I send e-mail reminders to others - and like them myself; but my e-mails get so cluttered I need the sticky note to remind me I have an e-mail I shouldn't just delete.


    1. LOL sticky notes for emails too
      Wow you must have quite a few

  18. At least she wrote stuff down. I try to remember it in my head because I'm lazy and that doesn't really work too well. ._.

    1. LOL sometimes it does slip away
      But I can usually remember it in my head most times of the day

  19. I do love these flappy follies. She is such the pest, but I must confess, these posts are funny as hell, as she doesn't seem to ever grasp the severity of her spell, inane people are just that and they can make one want to start sniffing crack, no, not the gassy kind, but the numbing end my days type, the kind most parents would not like. Old flappy, I do believe has a crush on thee, she acts dumb enough to get you hot, but she misinterprets that heat can also mean anger, which, I do fear will put the annoying flap in danger that's very, very real. Her moronic exploits definitely seem to increase each show, as it is painfully obvious, this flappy doesn't perceive or learn too well…but, on the bright side, she brings laughter to your page

    1. Yeah that is true
      Can bring a laugh or two
      After the fact is through
      For she is enough to literally turn on blue
      Maybe she did a whole bunch of crack
      Which now leas to her dumbass attack

  20. I can't get over what a storyteller you are!


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