Hit The Decks For It's Real People, Real Sex!

The cat rarely pays attention to that DM stuff over at the Twitter way. But I thought it would be fun to put some on display. I mean people have such wise things to say each and every day.

Real People, Real Sex.
But they don't tell the specs.
Wanna feck?
My aren't you, who's 5000 miles away, a schmuck.

Buy it right now!
Holy cow!
Buy it today!
Is that all you have to say?

People are talking about you.
The cat is used to such things coming due.
Exclusive photos, so cool.
No one wants to see you in your undies, fool.

What on earth do you think they are doing on this video?
After the underwear guy, I really don't want to know.
Go to blank for free gifts and tips.
Hmmm charging you up the ass didn't come from our lips.

You're invited to join a private beta launch now!
Some how I don't think it is such a private vow.
Check us out!
If I don't will you pout?

Someone is making up a horrible blog about you.
All I can say is whoopdi friggin doo.
They got you on.
Well I got them by leaving a present on their lawn.

Take a look, let me know what you think.
I think you don't look good in pink.
Magic Submitter!
I bet the bathtub is bitter.

Just what exactly have you been doing inside this video?
Did you catch me cleaning myself down below?
Hmmm did someone cop a feely?

Top stories today!
Hmm I never gave you any to display.
Donate to a great cause.
Like getting rid of those zombie foot claws?

Over $20,000,000 cash out already.
My aren't you giving money away steady.
Claim your share!
Those who don't like monopoly money, beware.

And there are so many more,
That you robot humans send to my shore.
How can such wonderful things come from your brain?
You robots must be so smart you are insane.

The cat just had to poke fun at the robots that run, with their fake human faces over at the Twitter DM races. Then there are the beggars and flat out no shame humans too. The cat will just flush them down the loo. But first I'll give them some gas and it will surely be the smelly kind that comes from my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.


  1. Well there's me officially annoyed Pat haha. Originally I had a pretty long comment typed up but forgot to press publish for some reason and after refreshing this page it's gone now. Anyway I basically just said that this was a great ode to the annoying dms that people can get on Twitter. My least favourite is the one where you get a message about people who have been talking about you with a link to what they said only for it to be like a false Twitter website that tries to get you to log in so it can take your Twitter name and password and probably send the messages out to others. These dm guys can be sneaky although some of their methods can just plain suck. Great post buddy.

    1. Bah just blame blogger
      Or maybe the guy who invented frogger haha
      For the mistake
      That you didn't make
      Yeah that is all it is
      One big con biz
      So they can steal your info
      And use your account to let their crap flow

  2. hahaha yeah i really dont care what people are saying about me, unless its you, what a bunch of knuckle heads nothing better to do than spam and some poor sucker will click it and his computer, they'll muck it...

    1. Yeah the computer will go down
      To repair town
      Should one click
      Meaning they aren't very slick

  3. Ha I used to be on twitter
    but there was too much chitter
    that I figured I'd stay fitter
    if I didn't get involved in pitter
    of which so much was litter
    (so I pulled the plug!)

    1. haha sounds like it wasn't rough
      Or at all tough
      To get rid of the fluff
      And let twitter go up in a puff

  4. I started out with twitter too
    But what a shabby thing to do
    But now I stick with my friends on the blog
    And it leaves me time to go out for a jog

    1. Yeah I just set up some to run
      One day a week under my sun
      And then ignore the thing
      More fun under bloggers wing

  5. I used to like Twitter but now it's a bore. I can't believe how many people click on those stupid DM links and let themselves be hack. Seriously, people!!!! What were you thinking????

    1. Yeah they are just asking for trouble
      And then whine when they get hacked and lost in the twitter rubble

  6. I just erase those DM messages on Twitter. Twitter can be fun but most of the time it's boring.

    1. Yeah that is about the size of it
      With their dm errr umm shit

  7. Initially, I found Twitter to be a bore
    But then I began to use it more
    I find it to be more minimalist that Facebook
    But then again, maybe that's just letting myself off the hook

    1. Yeah it is a bore
      But can be fun to explore
      And must be used too
      If one wants to get a book view

  8. I never pay attention to them Pat ~ They all just want your money, that's it ~

    Have a good day ~

  9. Twitter has quite a few twits
    maybe a kick in their bits
    would make them quit.

  10. Another good reason for my Twitter account to remain dusty...

    1. Letting it remain in the dust
      Sure isn't a bust

  11. -chuckle- Makes me more-glad, that I no longer have a home at Twitter's Pad.

    Eeeeek! You've actually got me trying this rhyming-thing! Unheard of! ,-)


    1. And rhymed you did
      Now it you will never get rid
      Bad grammer there
      But I don't care haha

  12. Twitter is the only social media that is archived by the Library of Congress!
    Ever since it's inception in 2006, which is quite the process!
    Lots of crap kept for all to see
    if someone wanted to read for a year or three.

    1. Damn, never knew that
      You would never get to read through all of that at any mat
      As there are billions of tweets a year
      To look at that would be something to fear

    2. lots of crap
      flowing from your trap?
      I'm sure you have lots of company
      as millions tweet quite frequently.

    3. Yeah tons there
      Most of which no one would care
      And crap flows the other way
      Just in case you are confused at your bay haha

    4. oh...yes, so it does.
      that's good to know...just because.
      But I didn't mean literal crap,
      just the kind where lips do flap.

    5. Haha that would be spit
      But it rhymes with umm shit
      Another word for it
      Getting all symatical at my pit hahaha

    6. lol....yes, but that I already knew!
      And that you need me, too!

    7. haha just beating you to the punch
      Either way I'm still out to lunch

  13. Now I know why I don't Twitter; I did like the part of leaving something on the lawn LOL :)


    1. Yeah best to avoid if you have no use for it
      Also fun leaving stuff on the lawn like err umm spit haha

    2. I think of you, Cat, every time I scoop the litter.
      Now, doesn't that just make you shiver?

    3. hahaha well that must mean you think of the cat a lot
      Considering there are a ton at your plot

    4. yep, no pringle can here.
      It wouldn't all fit, I fear.

    5. haha I use the plastic bins from my spinach now
      They can hold a ton but smell and may raise an eyebrow haha

  14. Sometimes the information overload mekes me giggle n' yawn at the same time.

    1. Yeah it can do both
      Although quickly annoys with its growth

  15. You mean there is a way to be rid of the zombie feet at your display?
    For that I may just have to pay!
    Those things caused me to spit and gag
    and dare I say cause me to nag
    that you never show them here again
    keep those feet locked up in a pen!

    1. haha maybe one day
      They wil be back on display
      I could have a one eyed thing drawn
      Walking around with zombie feet across a lawn

  16. Yeah. No shame humans. Leave presents on their lawns!

  17. Definitely a major information overload!

  18. orlin N cassie

    there bee a reezon
    we doeznt twitter
    N itz got nothin ta due with

    .... TWEET...burd

    coz if itz crap we bee wantin
    N crap ta bee seein
    we'll chek out R litter box


    1. hahaha should have known
      You would hold the phone
      Because of the bird
      Twitter is absurd

  19. People are always talking, right? I just don't want to know what it is they're saying :) I like the new header! Hope all is well with you!

    1. Yeah they always have something to say
      An most of it is trah at twitter's bay

  20. Ah, Twitter's for the birds
    And a lousy place to meet.
    Such behavior is absurd;
    I'd rather toot than tweet.

    1. haha tooting is fun
      Can get a shun
      But oh well
      Toot them to hell

  21. Twitter is an inane fad
    And facebooking is just as bad
    Why report on every meal you've had?
    Or that your kid has the hiccups
    And dog's got the flu
    To hide all the updates
    Is what one must do.
    Still I prefer it to twitter
    It's easy to use and not nearly as bitter.


    1. Yeah facebook is crap
      Made that take a dirt nap
      Who cares about all the junk
      People put up to get some attention to their funk
      Twitter works because you can ignore
      Easily the crap that comes ashore

  22. I almost never Tweet
    So I said, "Well, f'ing sheeeeeeet"
    'Cause my account was hacked
    And I got a bunch of flack
    From Kitties who got spammed,
    Shoot, they were all like, "Damn!"

    1. Quite the woes
      Must curl your toes
      Need to track the hacker down
      And stab them with your crown

  23. Haha this is fun! Rhyming cat...who knew?

    1. Yeah is kind of crazy
      But the cat is never lazy

  24. Our mom says poop on Twitter, she doesn't care what everyone thinks every moment of the day. Same with FB, it can be the worst kind of keeping up with the Joneses.

    1. Yeah facebook can kiss my gazoo
      I really hate that too

  25. I don't even read my twitter feed. It goes a little too fast for my non rhyming ass.

    1. Yeah I ignore most
      That shows up on Twitter's coast

  26. it's rather sad that robots have twitter and I don't.

    1. Well you need a robot you
      To handle the robot twitter crew

  27. I'm with Adam. Not Twitter for me, no need to see that stuff.

    1. Yeah is a load of bunk
      That you don't need to kerplunk


  28. I never use Twitter Pat; bore me:( anyway here a lot of people use and comment twitt!

    1. Yeah it is very boring
      Could leave one snoring


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