Take Stock With A Gawk!

So the cat pulled a gawker and had a ball watching what took place at a selling hall. One of those back and forth things, I hid in the wings. I guess cats were not allowed. Pfft like I really wanted to be near this dirty human crowd.

Going once, going twice,
This is a great price.
Find it here, find it there,
You can't get this anywhere.

Not too high, not too low,
Look at this thing glow.
From the hip give a tip,
Open your wallet and let it drip.

That is great, that is grand,
Too bad it is a little bland.
But never fear, just come near,
I will pay you something my dear.

A wonderful deal, a wonderful charge,
You can't get this price on any barge.
Across the seas, across the lands,
I'm the only one who'll take it off your hands.

Give me your trust, I'll give you some cash,
It is so much better than throwing it in the trash.
See it my way, see it your way,
Help yourself with money in your tray.

The best decision, the best choice.
Now take your cash and rejoice.
Go on now, go on home,
I'll save you the trouble of selling this gnome.

Come on, come all,
This thing is ten feet tall.
Grab a chair, have a stare,
This item is so rare.

Flip your lid, give a bid.
Tell your daddy, kid.
Don't pass it up, don't pass it by.
This item will surely fly.

Great choice mister, what a great buy.
Who cares if your wallet went dry.
You now have this, you now have that.
My you look fine in that hat.

I have no guilt, I have no shame,
This is all part of the game.
So I swindled, so I cheated,
I never said they had to be defeated.

With my profit, with my gain,
I just let the money rain.
Sorry mister, sorry miss,
These are fair prices and your offer brings no bliss.

Worse than car salesmen I will say. At least you know you are going to get screwed at that bay. It is just plain rude to not know it and get screwed. At least a drink could be bought first. Was interesting watching such a burst. The cat was through with their selling sass and perked up his tail, walking away giving them his little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.


  1. "A wonderful deal, a wonderful charge,
    You can't get this price on any barge."

    This is so true Pat, some of these sales are ridiculous, how companies try to put across the point that their sales are the be all and end alls. I can understand why since it's a world where you have to say you're the best to thrive but to the average consumer it's a real pain and only comes across as petty games.

    1. Yeah they try to sell sell sell
      With much they think is swell
      Flapping their yap
      As they up the price gap

  2. Selling is a crap
    The idea is to grab
    We part with our money
    They'll snigger undoubtedly
    They push their products
    They make a fast buck
    We're not even aware
    That we're laid bare


    1. Ruined your streak
      With 2nd at my creek
      And yeah trying to get a fast sell
      Which they suck your money away thinking what the hell

  3. Nothing but a deal,
    pushed at you with zeal,
    it makes me fecking squeal.

    1. haha that would be funny
      They'd still take your money

  4. haha so you went to an auction house
    like out friend at the zoo house?
    its the name of the game if you want sales
    make sure they can like without earring snails
    old rail road rails or what for

    1. that would be me...
      and my zoo full of kitties.

    2. Yeah have to have one to hear
      All the sales that are near

      Wasn't hard to guess
      That I will confess haha

  5. Look--ee look-ee what they have here
    I think I'd rather have a beer.
    My neck feels like a twisted patch
    Trying to watch a tennis match.
    I see cat behind the curtain
    Thinking humanoids dumb for certain.
    Pat bought the surprise box, what a deal
    He thinks he really made a steal
    But cat laughs hard at whats inside
    It's a litter-bag of kitty pride.

    1. Well litter works too
      So the cat can go to the loo
      And dig around
      Still Pat has no deal being found
      Although a twisted neck
      Makes me want to hit the deck

  6. To get cheated and swindled is no fun Pat
    specially with your hard earned cash ~
    I always say don't go impulse shopping,
    but think and come back another time ~

    Happy Sunday to you ~

    1. Yeah that it is not
      Pat takes his time an isn't hot to trot
      Fun to watch some though
      As they go about the selling show

  7. I think a ten-foot tall gnome would go nicely with my garden Yeti. Sold! ;)

    1. There you go
      Now a snowman and be quite the show

  8. well, sound like a fun place to gawk
    did you see anyone in a mohawk? ha.
    Was it really an auction
    or just a fleamarket type thing?

    1. Nope no mohawk was around
      At least not that could be found
      It was a bit of both
      The flea market stuff was up front and the auction was more south

  9. I would like to see an old timey auction. Or be the guy saying the stuff.

    1. haha running you mouth that fast
      Would be a blast

  10. It's not
    bad I
    don't think
    you can
    get things
    pretty cheap.

    Really auctions can be great. You have to go early and look at what's on the floor and know what you want to buy and what your willing to pay. If they're auctioning off things that could be got dirt cheap at a boot sale, then you don't want to go to that auction house.

    Yeah, I'm disagreeing with you Cat. Bring it on!

    1. Yeah you can get thing cheap
      If up the price didn't creep
      I don't mind them much
      I watch and such
      But that was it
      This was way back before all the shit haha

  11. I don't think I could survive an auction very well. Too much yelling, too many people, too many rapid-fire decisions you have to make. :P

    1. haha yeah but it is fun to watch in the back
      As they go on the bidding attack

  12. Ha, I would rather not have to decide
    as up the price does slide
    with no time to think on my side!

    1. Yeah makes it easier to do
      When just one price is in view

  13. It sounds like walking around Time Square once the sun sets, right cat?

    1. Yeah that is true
      Plenty of nuts there shoutihg crap in your view

  14. Hahaha! Our mom is a printer, or at least she works at a printing company. We don't think she'd like to be smashed, unless it involves Bombay Sapphire.

    1. Yeah that would be bad
      Just smash the machines at your pad

  15. This has a catchy rhythm and would make a great song.
    The cat is smarter than humans. We think we're saving money when we spend it.


    1. A song to be sung
      When the spending is rung
      For they fall for a sale
      Without fail

  16. The winning bid I've sometimes made
    And then, somehow, my desire can fade
    And of course I rue my stupid bid
    And wish on my greed I'd kept the lid.

    1. That seems to be the case
      As buyers remorse takes place

  17. Hey Cat, your Royal Rhyming Ass is appearing on my blog tomorrow. I'm posting your consort HRH the female Pirate Cat and you figure in the story.

    I'm off to paint a bodacious female archer.

    Nitey Nite Cat.

    1. That cat will love that
      Be over soon to your mat

  18. haha, such a FUN take on an auction. I usually very much enjoy them, even if I can't afford 'em. :)

    1. Yeah they are fun to watch too
      As some interesting things can come due

  19. I'm fairly certain eBay auctions would be more entertaining to watch simply because the item is so outlandish.

    1. That is very true
      Prob bid on smiley faced poo


Post a Comment