A Safe Bet It's A Threat!

You know they say if you're going to threaten someone make it good. But does it really matter in one's hood? For many a threat is just that. It is something you will never do at your mat.

I am going to kick your ass.
You say it with such class.
You even beat the poor sap up to.
But you never kicked him where he uses a loo.

If I see you again I will kill you.
Has surely come due.
But that never takes place.
Unless one is a nutcase.

I will send you packing.
Something about that one is lacking.
Why would I want to pack?
Better to threaten with a thumbtack.

I will hit you with my car.
Unless drunk at a bar,
That will not come due.
Especially if inside a building at your zoo.

If you don't do that you will be fired.
After you are long past hired.
Another empty one that comes due,
With no fat to chew.

I will throw you out the window.
Meanwhile you are a foot above the ground at your show.
That really is some threat.
Plus most weigh more than a pet.

I will never watch your movie again.
Many say at their den.
To a person who can't even hear them at all.
Then at the next one they are again at the movie hall.

I will put you in detention.
That sure deserves a mention.
Hearing it a time or ten.
But it rarely came due at my den.

I will clean your clock.
That would be a shock.
First I have to have clock.
But you can shine the lock.

Take the trash out or no sex.
That one can convex.
But just in case the trash will go.
No since tempting fate so things will not grow.

Now you see how threats are dumb in a way with my hum. But they do make one feel better at times with their threatening chimes. Maybe I should threaten that if any trespass, I will pass gas on them with my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.


  1. Too late by like 30 seconds to be the first comment but I still enjoyed this post as well, euphemisms for fighting are silly because like you point out even if you do fight and win you don't end up doing what you say you'll do or we say things that somebody can't even hear like the music thing. Nobody has ever had somebody's guts for garters I'm sure.

    1. haha nope no guts for garters
      They are just farters

  2. Threats are made in utmost haste
    Meaningless words always a waste
    Life goes on in it's merry way
    Doesn't matter what we say
    Feed the pet and wash the dish
    Don't forget to make a wish

    1. Make a wish at the dish?
      Can I get more than fish?
      That would be grand
      Across the land

  3. ha. taking the trash out right now, as i dont want anything in the way of a pow wow...and if you dont follow through you just erode your own authority and the other stops taking you seriously

    1. Yeah that is true
      A joke you become at your zoo
      Humpty hump away
      At your bay lol

  4. Lately I've been using, "I will cut you."
    For some reason, people just laugh at me.
    Maybe it's just not menacing enough. It can't possibly be that I'm not menacing enough.

  5. I love to say "I'm gonna open up a can of whoop ass on ya" but what the hell does that even mean????

    1. haha no friggin idea at all
      Some weird extinct product at the grocery hall

  6. Threats are just that, they stay as threats
    Better not to utter so they'll accord respect
    in the long run
    they'll see as fun
    To be together meeting challenges with impact


    1. Challenges will come
      And can flap ones gum
      Or just give them a go
      At ones show

  7. Many threats are empty and hollow
    Don't know why they make us scared so that we gulp when we swallow
    Bullies are really big about making threats
    But in the end they always have to pay their debts

    1. They get it for their threatening trends
      Maybe end up wearing something called depends

  8. Taking out the trash or you can't have no ass.
    I always liked the heavy sarcasm, you can ruin someones day with a nice one liner. Im too nice to do it though...maybe. I had an older brother who used to ask me what the future was like and when i said i didn't know he offered to 'knock me in to next week' so i could find out.

    1. hahaha that is a nice offer I suppose
      Could get the lottery numbers after such woes

  9. Any threat - always negative,
    avoid it at your cliff.

  10. Why, I'm never going to comment here again!

    1. lol riiiiight
      See you tomorrow at my site

    2. Oh, the empty threats!
      You saw right through that, I bet!

    3. haha easy one
      Although you came back sooner than a day under my sun

  11. most are mostly talk

    few would be a shock

  12. I always said I'd never be the mom who threatens with counting ( I hate that, I guess because my mom did it so often ) but I recently found myself telling my son, 'You have until I count to one to clean this up...one!' and he jumped up to clean. Maybe I've been missing out. I didn't even have a mean mom tone and he jumped up to clean. :)

    1. Lol not even a meanie for him to clean
      I guess the counting pays at your scene

  13. I noticed the one threat to which you will obey,
    Men! That's all I'll say.

  14. threats in rhyming.. that will be interesting :P
    no one ever do that..

    I think they are all just attention seekers..
    losers in their lives, they think acts like these make them strong..

    1. Yeah that is true,
      They are a looser at their zoo

  15. I think passing gas on them would be worst than cleaning their clock. lol

    1. lol scare them away
      With a gas attack at my bay

  16. "I will hit you with my car." Why does that sound so familiar?

    1. Hmm wonder where i got that from
      Beats my little rhyming bum

  17. Threats are bad.
    Your readers best agree.
    I'll brook no argument at your sea.
    If they argue the point?
    If they talk smut?
    I'll kick 'em hard
    and show 'em what's what.

    VR Barkowski

    1. haha kick them to the head
      Send them to bed
      Kick them in the butt
      Send them to a hut
      Kick them in the dick
      They'll go nowhere quick lol

  18. orlin N cassie...N trooly N reely....peepulz wood freek fallin outta a window...one foot ta de ground ...they bee such panzeez.....catz rool...heerz two a grate week oh end, eat plentee oh ham samiches N pie !!

    1. haha yeah they are pretty sad
      We just hop gracefully at our pad

  19. Oh yeah, cat….Frankie's gonna kick your ass! Just you wait and see!

  20. Most threats are empty and no fun.
    A desperate way to get things done.
    They work only for the dumb.


    1. That they do
      Time and time again at their zoo

  21. We do have lots of sayings for threats
    didn't think of them until now
    amazing that you could come up with them
    and put them into a rhyme, wow!


    1. Just popped in one day
      And away I went at my bay

  22. You use a car as a weapon? Bruce Willis does too!

  23. We really do have a clock that needs cleaning MOL!

    1. lol take that threat then
      Then they'll clean it for you at your den

  24. Empty threats are worse than farty pets. Clean your clock? What a crock! And I learned something new. Now I know why someone always takes the trash out at my zoo :)

    1. hahaha knows how to keep on your good side
      Takes the trash out with pride

  25. today, you're rhyming empty threats
    some would certainly bring regrets
    some may cause stomach upsets
    some may cause you reasons to fret

    it would be more fun to play roulette..lol...
    win some money on a few spins..
    would that be a sin?????

    1. haha no way
      No sin on display
      Just winning
      And then lots of grinning lol

    2. winning is the way to go
      smiling with all the dough
      would make us glow
      enjoying our show...

    3. And nothing more
      Needed in store
      At our bay
      Maybe some hay? lol

  26. Kick him where he uses the loo?
    Why that won't do!
    No ifs, ands, or but[t]s
    'tis best to go for his nuts.

    1. Cashews or Peanuts?
      Brazil nut ruts?
      So many to choose
      How can I lose

  27. I was never big on threats until I had kids. Now it's a daily thing. Do this, or your grounded. Do that or no birthday party. And so on. Sad thing is, I never follow through, so my threats are pretty much pointless and my kids know it lol

    1. haha I guess if anything they are fun to say
      There at your bay

  28. One man's threat is another man's motivation... ;-)

  29. Empty threats from an irate mother
    Hit the funny spot like no other.
    "I brought you into this world," says she.
    "So it makes no difference to me.
    I'll take you out, and make another."

  30. Ha, I haven't had anyone threaten me in quite a while...thank goodness! It can be quite frightening when it happens though.

  31. Don't make threats. Say nothing at all.

    And then the sudden shock of being mailed elephant poop is that much more shocking.

    1. haha yeah that would be quite the shock
      As at the poop they gawk

  32. I've been threatening for many a year
    To throw our copy machine on its ear
    Out the window and down 30 floors
    Never to be seen again at any shores
    But I've never acted upon the threat
    Because fired is what I'd get!!!

    1. haha I want to do that
      to the postage machine at my work mat
      Smash it to bits
      It is the shits

  33. If it is a threat
    A lie is a safe bet

  34. The only way you can get the guys to do something in the house is with nagging, but no one feels like he is a winner after that.

    1. Yeah with only nagging
      There comes no bragging


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