Top Ten In Pencil Not Pen!

It seems everywhere you go there is some list all set up in a nice neat row. The top ten things to eat. The top ten ways to clean your feet. The top ten movies this year. The top ten ways to wipe your rear. They just show and show. Let's make them eat crow.

A top ten list,
Not to be missed.
Raises your eyes,
Become more wise.

Who really cares,
If your food has hairs.
The top ten places to eat,
Beats top ten ways to wash your feet.

Maybe the feet thing would work,
If in Betsy's toe thing you lurk.
But back on point,
Toward each top ten joint.

This top ten says on thing,
That one gives another ring.
This one gives another one.
Aren't top tens fun?

Each top ten list,
That can't be missed,
Has a top ten not the same.
Each making a different top ten claim.

On the very same thing.
Like giving food a ring.
Top ten to lose weight.
All give a different plate.

When you just have to eat less, move more.
I guess top two has a bad ring at ones shore.
Have to have that top ten.
But wait! It is not written in pen.

The top ten will change.
That is not strange.
Found a new one.
Now it is a top twenty run.

Or maybe still top ten,
We got rid of the hen.
That was not tops in the first place.
A false top ten case?

People like pretty numbers,
With brains like cucumbers.
Top ten ways to top that.
Whack one over the head with a bat.

Ready to make a top ten list? You could make people pissed. They might be mad if your top ten list is different from another pad. Top ten ways to piss people off. Hmm 100's of ways to make them scoff. But the cat will save that for another pass with my top one little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.


  1. 'Each making a different top ten claim'
    More often than not they are just lame
    Just going for the record
    Feeding the ego of sorts
    Can one be blamed for 15 mins of fame?


    1. That is what they try
      To up stats to the sky
      Ego bursts forth
      Send them packing far far up north

  2. Well, I was going to make a list of the top ten rhyming blogs, but I guess not...
    Everyone's top ten is unique to them unless it deals with actual number facts.

    1. Yeah all opinion once more
      And I'd win that obviously at your shore lol

  3. I have blogged some of my top-10 lists before
    I have done movies, tv shows, and travel destinations at my shore
    I'll never do top 10 ways to clean your feet though
    That's a little too weird for my show

    1. haha I bet it could be done
      Give top ten ways to clean your feet a run

  4. um i care if my food has hair, and so do the dead milkmen
    i guess, if you top ten, what of the rest, is eleven that far behind,
    spinal tap thinks it is fine, one more even, if its all top ten
    what a bore, its all opinion anyway, so peel the onion and find
    the one fer yerself yung un

    1. Yep, have to find out for yourself
      Trying thing at your shelf
      Opinions are like assholes they say
      And some top tens are that anyway

  5. How about a top ten for Walter Mittys,
    Dreaming away in their 'burbs and cities?
    And if you wouldn't go for that,
    Top ten ways to tease a cat?

    1. A cat will get you back
      So better stick with your first top ten attack

  6. If one ever makes it to the top ten
    Be prepared and always carry a pen
    Your fans will follow you in droves
    Always wanting little fishys and loaves
    You'll be in demand till your toes are all curled
    If you're in the top ten richest in the world

    1. haha yeah all will want a piece
      Trying to get some golden fleece
      Have to move to Timbuktu
      To be left alone at your zoo

  7. Why is it always the top ten?

    Not eleven, just one and zero again

    1. May all have OCD
      And need it even at their sea

  8. My top ten would be different
    than someone else's I do think
    they get the publicity about it
    and for mine, they don't even blink.


    1. Yeah they go for the grand
      Trying to appease across the land

  9. Places to wash my feet?
    I need more among us.
    It sure would be sweet
    to wash my toe fungus.

  10. When I was doing periodical work they often asked for lists of... phft
    I get tired of lists of...


  11. Top ten is only an assessment by someone else's pen
    the next time they are rated it will be different again!

  12. Is there really ten ways to clean one's feet?? I am sure there is, since there is a top ten list for everything else. So who cares, it will change in the next day. Have a great day Pat.

    1. Yeah i bet ten there could be
      But that won't be done by me

  13. I, too, have done top lists
    Favorite snowflakes crafters may have missed
    And because they often inquire
    Which do I most admire
    Cycling music I count down, as well
    Because I know my list will never sell
    But I've never been one to stick with ten
    When 13 or 25 is more fun at my den

    1. That is a good way
      Just go with what you want at your bay
      Whether 10 or 52
      Easy enough to come due

  14. i would be interested in the top ten list to clean the feet...honestly...smiles

    1. lol geez, all want that
      Hmmmm get them licked by a cat

  15. Ten best things about Canada
    twould be fun and give you quite
    a run.

    Your bearded ladies I adore
    maple syrup forever more

    Mounties in red so
    snappily dressed
    look better than all the rest,

    The fish you eat
    smells like feet
    but gobble it up
    you do.

    Soap made from whales
    that make you smell
    but in Winter keeps you warm
    as fat repels most every storm.

    The toothless fad
    is quite the show
    as Hockey sets
    your skin a glow.

    The Buffalo you ride
    and sit astride
    full of majesty and of pride.

    With Canadian bacon
    I am quite taken.

    Your Oompa Loompas
    are really super
    such colour leaves
    me in a stupor.

    Last but not
    least is your zombie feet

    1. Canadian bacon is an american thing
      So enjoy that at your american wing
      The toothless hicks are on a spree
      I'll send them to visit thee
      With zombies toes galore
      Riding buffalo to your shore
      Then as the buffalo squat
      Your gardens will get fertilized a lot
      Enjoy the smell
      Bet you'll find it swell

  16. You should do a top ten list of the worst Buzzfeed top ten lists. I swear every time I see someone link to one of those top ten lists I drop a few IQ points.

    "Top Ten Super Sexy Facts About Beyonce That Will Blow Your Skull Outside of Your Face!!!!"

    Go die in a fire, Buzzfeed.

    1. haha I try and avoid that
      No IQ points need to be lost by the cat
      I wouldn't piss on buzzfeed if it were on fire
      Let it die and the flames grow higher haha

  17. I wonder what is on the bottom 10!

  18. Top ten list
    In case you missed
    Of blogging cats
    Crapping on mats
    Of blogging dogs
    That leave you agog
    Of top ten blog fests
    Yes, I jests.

    1. Cats crap in a shoe
      Easier to do
      Can hide it with ease
      Blog fests is a breeze

  19. I want to know the bottom ten. Because if you flip the bottom ten upside down, they'd be the top ten.

    1. Just do a little flip
      And let the bottom ten rip

  20. Top 10 reasons why
    I'm never #1 at your blog, though I try.
    1) I really don't try
    2) that was a lie
    3) It's not you, it's me
    4) I'm asleep when you post
    5) And you're always on a post-spree
    6) Plus Hank's always first
    7) That reason's the worst.
    8) He's done it again.
    9) Think I'll try to be number
    10) ten.

    1. lol maybe you need to cheat
      Find a way to hit delete
      Make Hank's #1 turn to dust
      #1 one day is a must

  21. Ironically I never am able to make it to ten. I get stuck at five or six.
    Nice poetry.

  22. orlin N cassie...R top ten list wood bee veree simpull

    top ten things we hate .....& in noe kinda order:

    burdz, bass turd burdz, sonz a bitchin burdz, bug infested burdz, caca droppin burdz, rood burdz, noizee burds, bass terd burds, see we spelled it diffrunt ther, what R we up two now...MF burdz, GDMF burdz and bass terd sonz a bitchin GDMF burdz !!! ♥♥♥

    1. Wow, new classifications of birds
      And some rather naughty words haha

  23. Better in pencil than in ink
    as tastes will change as quick as a wink!
    But you must like my toes, I think,
    as you mention them, with my tongue in an blink.
    Whoa. That thought might be misunderstood
    by someone in your neighborhood.
    HA! lol....

    1. lol hmmm yeah that could go a whole other way
      You'll just have to put the numb tongue on display
      Then all will be clear
      To any that are near

    2. That was a once in a lifetime mistake.
      Of it again I will not partake!

    3. haha keep the raid far far away
      When in use at your bay

  24. I think making a list of top 10 is a marketing ploy specially when you are listing destinations or food or things to buy ~

    But its fun reading them anyway ~ Have a good day Pat ~

    1. Yeah they are all to generate hits
      And many are the pits

  25. Everybody make top ten list and ask with Adam why ten?? Can be 11 or 12 i do t know and is not matter lol

    1. lol can be whatever you want it to be
      There at your cooking sea

    2. Yeah and many people make:
      My ten better recipes
      My better 10 pictures
      The better recipes of the year
      Etc etc etc

    3. That they do
      And the next year the same thing comes into view

  26. Top 10, 11 or 12
    I will not delve
    Lists are boring
    Leave me snoring

  27. I don't like finding my own hair in my food but when I find someone elses... I could gag.

    1. Nasty as can be
      I've found a cat hair or three

  28. Top ten lists are all opinions or trying to sell something

  29. The most dreaded top ten list is finding ten willing bloggers to share blog awards.

    1. haha yeah that can be a pain in the rump
      Why I avoid that hump

  30. I am not sure if everyone's attention span is long enough for top 10 of anything anymore. Maybe Top 5? Top 3? Just Top?

    I'll keep working on it.

  31. I'd love to try
    top 10 things
    for better fly,

    I'd go for adventure
    to top 10 places
    with warm temperature.

    But the top 10 rhyming sites
    better to change to one 'Rhyme Time' !

    1. I get the win
      Works for my bin
      Vacation places too
      I'd like to come due

  32. My Human is silly
    But she reads willy-nilly
    Anything done as a list
    Or as Q&A which makes her get pissed
    At the stupid time she wastes
    When she should be making haste!

    1. And ignoring you
      How rude of her at your zoo

  33. Lists are so freaking stupid. Take those "most beautiful people" lists that come out each year. None that make the cover are all that gorgeous, yet there they are. The most beautiful because some asshat that runs a magazine said they were. Hmph to lists!

    1. haha yep those asshat's get their way
      As they own the display

  34. The only lists I seem to make is when I am on someones shit list. That is a list no one wants to be on.

    1. haha but then again it can be fun
      As they leave you alone when on that list you have run


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