Blogvengers Part Eight, All Try And Relate!

Chapter 8
The Final Hours
Zombies With Powers

     Orlin had his tail in the air. He was walking along humming to himself with such flair. He hissed as Pat grabbed him by the tail, yanking him back. He looked ahead and found he almost ended up a zombie snack.
     "I guess you just proved who the brighter cat is." Cassie gloated while Truedessa shh-ed them both. She did not want things to head south.
     "Too many demons for even your crystal magic."
     "The cat thinks we should run away. Maybe we can come back another day?"
     "Scaredy cat."
     Truedessa tried to speak to shut them all up. But she found she could not even hiccup. Her voice and magic was sucked away. She flailed her arms around, leaving the group in disarray.
     "Now is no time for charades. Does she want to put on zombie parades?"
     "Is thee casting a spell?"
     "She lost her voice you idiots."
     Truedessa nodded to Cassie and gave Pat and Orlin a dirty look. They both shrugged and knew it had to be some super powered zombie voice stealing crook. Their ears all perked up as they heard Truedessa's voice. A zombie was using it and they now knew that had no choice.
     "A voice stealing demon. That shall not do. Let's slay them all." Pat picked up a branch and used it like a sword. He stood all brave looking with it like he was receiving a reward.
     "Here we go. Let's kill zombies high and low." Orlin jumped out ready to fight. His hair stood on end as the zombie army caught his sight.
     "Those two are such idiots. How does anyone put up with them?"
     Cassie and Truedessa searched for a way to make the voice stealing zombie and his army pay. Truedessa pointed to a tree and Cassie climbed it quickly. She bounced on a branch until Truedessa could reach. Truedessa grabbed it, yanked it back, let it fly and heard a loud zombie screech.
     The branch whacked many incoming zombies off their feet. It even beheaded some and caused their heads to roll down the street. The voice stealing zombie yelled for all to attack. It seemed to be the leader of the pack.
     "Maybe this was a bad idea, you think? I think I need a drink."
     "Come back here, cat!"
     Pat stood all alone with his sword like stick while zombies neared looking like they wanted to do more than give him a lick. Their drool dripped more and more with every step they took. Pat's OCD kicked in and he gave his stick a look.
     "What the hell? Stupid voices."
     Pat dropped the stick and ran away. But the zombies already had their scent and knew the way. They searched for a way to get Truedessa's magic back, so she could go on a zombie killing attack. They all turned to a honk as the zombies closed in. Drazin was taking some army vehicle for a spin.
     "Drazin has to save you two and the fleabags again." Drazin yelled as he waved to the back. He and the others soon made short work of the zombie attack.
     Drazin ran down the zombies that came near, squashing them from ear to ear. Brian and Hank popped out from one side while Alex and Mary popped out the other with such pride. They all started firing away, leaving only the voice stealing zombie running the other way.
     Truedessa raised her hand to Drazin who tossed her a gun. She marched up to the voice stealing zombie and ended his fun. She shot it right in the head. The zombie peeled over good and dead.
     "Remind Drazin never to piss her off."
     The group jumped out of the truck and Pat and the cats did not know for sure if they were in luck. All they could think of was Brian's evil gawker counterpart and the ninja wannabe taking nakedness and clones to heart.
     "The cat does not want to see another naked ninja wannabe. And you are in for a shock, if you try and gawk."
     "Drazin though the same thing, fleabag. But they are fine in this zombie hell."
     "I'm number one!" Hank cheered with delight and the cats looked at him like he was not right.
     "Who is that again?"
     "Drazin does not know. But he sure likes to be number one."
     "My magic has not returned. We are going to have to do this the hard way. But I know the towers are that way." Truedessa rejoined the group, wiping off a bit of zombie goop.
     "So is that they way out? Drazin needs to get out of this place."
     "That is the way to a zombie free day."
     Drazin hopped back in the truck and the rest all followed as they waded through the dead zombie muck. Drazin hit the gas and headed to where Truedessa had said. Everyone hoping they would soon see the last of the undead.
     "I see, so his comrades are coming to save him. This should be delightful."
     A shadow like zombie stood beside his king, reporting back everything. Babylon smiled at Trucker who was chained up to the wall. He was ready to make the last of the humans fall.
     "You...won'" Trucker muttered, still tired and weak, almost unable to speak.
     The king of the zombies hobbled across the floor and opened his over sized door. He whispered something to the guard and then a few minutes later all the zombies started clearing the yard. The area in front of the two towers was bare. Babylon was excited for the group to enter his lair.
     "I will finally get a little action. The last humans in this city are coming to me. This will be delightful."
     Babylon sat back down in his torn up throne. He kept repeating the word "delightful" while giving a zombie like groan. He rubbed his rotting hands together going over his plan. He could not wait to watch the final ending of man.
     "Well this isn't a trap or anything."
     "Maybe the zombies are having a spring fling?"
     The two cats stared at the bare entrance to the two towers. They both would rather deal with the blood thirsty crazies with flowers. The whole group knew it was a trap, but they had to risk it to get off this zombie infested map.
     They all jumped back as the ground beneath them peeled back, each readying themselves for an attack. An elevator rose up with only one zombie on it. He then seemed to be going through some zombie ninja fit. The zombie was only three inches tall. Drazin thought it would be funny to bounce him around like a ball.
     "Drazin will leave this to the ninja wannabe."
     "A Mortal Kombat fight. This should be a fun sight."
     Alex took some ninja stance and the shrimpy zombie gave him a funny glance. It then disappeared from view and reappeared hopping on top Alex's shoe. It ran right up his pant leg and into his butt crack. Alex danced about like he was under a flea attack.
     "Get this out of me. I don't play such a tune." Alex dropped his pants and gave all a fool moon. It was like something right out of a cartoon.
     "I said no more naked ninja wannabes. I don't care if you like the breeze."
     The cat ran over and smacked the tiny zombie out of Alex's butt crack. It then hopped on the cat and tried to go on the attack. Orlin just flipped him off and into the air. Brian grabbed a log and straightened up his mohawk hair.
     "Does he do that hair thing for luck?" Cassie shrugged, not really caring, while the rest of the group continued staring.
     Brain swung the log as the tiny zombie came down and it looked like he hit it clear into another town. But it had zipped away just in time. It then ate his mohawk hair, cutting Brian down in his prime.
     "A bald gawker. That is a bit of a shocker." Orlin laughed at Brian's new look. Brian sat and decided to sook.
     "That thing is fast." Mary tried to throw a rock at it and missed it by more than a bit.
     "But I am number one." Hank declared and then the zombie ate his shirt a bit. It left a number two, which was not a hit.
     "This road runner tiny zombie need to be put to rest. Let's go, demon." Pat signaled for Drazin to help out. But Drazin just ignored his shout.
     Pat tried to step on it but then he tripped in zombie spit. He tried to get up and was in OCD hell. This tiny zombie seemed to be ringing everyone's bell. Truedessa tried to help out but she slipped too, once again covered in zombie goo.
     Cassie and Orlin stood side by side in some grass. They taunted the zombie about his tiny mass. He struck a pose and ran at them quick. The tiny zombie then slowed like he was as heavy as a brick. Drazin walked over and stepped on it. He was squashed with one single hit.
     "I guess not burying our waste can help turn tiny zombies to paste."
     The cats laughed about the zombie getting slowed down by their unburied shit. Drazin wiped his boot on the grass trying to rid it of it. The rest of the group got up and tried to get past the embarrassing fight. Pat rolled in clean grass, trying to free himself of his zombie goo plight. The groups then formed and seemed ready to go. Alex feeling violated, Brian feeling bald and Hank trying to hide his new number two logo.
     "So two towers. Who wants to take number one and who wants to take number two?" Mary pointed to each entrance and rolled her eyes at Hank, as he hopped toward number one like he was getting paid by a bank.
     "Number one!"
     "Drazin will go with these guys. Drazin can't help the fleabags all the time."
     Drazin stood with Mary, Brian, Alex and Hank, all ready to make tower one walk the plank. He then shook his head, like a worse sight had come than the undead.
     "You eejits aren't getting out of here without me and my Amazonian lesbian lover." Anne and Elsie popped up from a sewer tunnel with a super powered zombie in hand. It was a shadow like thing that looked rather bland.
     "I believe this is the cause of your trouble." Anne heaved the zombie at Truedessa's feet. She then took her heel and smashed its head into the concrete.
     Truedessa felt her magic coming back after Anne's head smashing attack. Elsie just stood by Anne's side, wishing she could talk. Drazin and Pat were glad she could not squawk. Drazin joined group number two as Anne and Elsie joined group number one's crew.
     "Like hell Drazin is going with the crazy Irish and her one eyed lesbian lover."
     "You eejits won't make it without me."
     "I'd rather take crazy Pat. Good luck and don't go splat."
     Orlin lead the way and Cassie, Truedessa, Pat and Drazin followed him, come what may. Anne marched in her Xena outfit with her group following behind. Alex and Brian really thought she had lost her mind. Both groups entered at the same time and readied themselves for trouble at the drop of a dime.


A bald Gawker, a violated ninja wannabe and a number two Hank? Damn, which is worse could be tough to rank. But I think the ninja wannabe may win. That is just a sin. Seems this story will go anywhere. And by the way, Anne said that is where she wanted her character to go at my lair. The cat is happy to make her a Xena lass. Then she can be made fun of more by my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.


  1. This is epic. Damn those zombies anyways! LOL

    1. Those zombies are a pain
      In their super powered lane

  2. Just wait, you'll again be number 2
    Here at the zombieland zoo;
    And then we can struggle over who's number 1
    Oh won't that be riotous fun! ;-)

  3. Thanks to Pat and the Cat sincere apologies for messing their words
    And Hank popped out from one side "I'm number one!" Hank cheered
    But I am number one." Hank declared not appearing so loco
    Just not easy for Hank trying to hide his new number two logo
    Mary rolled her eyes at Hank, as he hopped toward number one efforts

    (The words were plagiarized from Pat and borrowed just so
    for the limericks to rhyme)


    1. haha limerick worked indeed
      As the story took seed
      Number one to number two
      And back again at my zoo

  4. I won't mess with Truedessa. She takes quick action. Reads like a book...

    1. That she does indeed
      When the zombies take seed

  5. The paths this story has to take
    Would make a zombie start to shake
    It's doubly bad Brian lost his hair
    A violated ninja, what a pair
    Truedessa lost her power and couldn't speak
    No more girly chatter for a long quiet streak
    Pat keeps fighting zombie goo
    Covering him from head to shoe
    The tale got weirder all the time
    Keeping in rhyme with zombie slime

    1. Weirder as we go
      Violations down below
      I think I'd rather take the goo
      The ninja can keep the violations that come due lol

  6. Hey, that's good writin' And I was sorry to hear Trudessa had lost her voice, lol. Though she does say things that are sometimes not very nice. ;)

    1. haha she can be mean in the videos that come due
      Maybe the voice loss was to teach her a thing or two

  7. Being violated like that would haunt even the best ninja

  8. Ha, another adventure at your bay
    Glad to see I was involved today!

  9. Maybe you had better get a bigger sword for the next battle!

  10. Trudessa's lost voice is a major tragedy!

  11. Zombies CAN be fun
    But, they also can be c**ts.
    Makes me think of one......
    A girl I dated once.

    1. I take it not swell?
      Hopefully you didn't behead her or toss her down a well

  12. That is quite the story. We like the way there is always so much action in all your stories. They are good ones for sure. Although I am not a Zombie person. Have a great day.

    1. Action is sure fun to throw in
      Glad it is another win

  13. A voice stealing zombie is tricky, cat. I would be zombie food if it stole mushys "mommyyy".

    Did you watch the walking dead?

    1. I watch the walking dead indeed
      Zombie food at your feed?
      Well they'd come up short
      Wouldn't be much sport lol
      Still haven't watched season 5 though
      Saving the first 8 up to binge watch at my show

  14. I need to be a ninja today.
    My boss asked me to transfer the miles and to buy two tickets to Disney: to her and her daughter. Ok, today in the morning I bought, so, I email then to show all the details about check in, etc. In the afternoon she asked me: " everything went right? just say nothing to my daughter, it will be a surprise."
    Sure I said nothing of the email.I called her daughter boyfriend and asked him to delete the email without her see! but if she see ... Well, it was a pleasure meeting you.

    1. haha hopefully she didn't see it
      That might make your boss have a fit

  15. I think I was just violated in the most unpleasant way. No more zombies up the ass.

    1. haha well Pat and Drazin fell in a huge ass
      What's worse? Up yours or up another's mass?

  16. An excellent write, a pleasure to read.

  17. orlin N cassie

    another grate chapter !! we can see thiz aza movie ....zombeez bee all de rage late lee...ORE a weekly tee vee seereez.....tell yur dad ta think a bout it...N everee one wood play...them selves !!! for a filming locationz...

    hope yur week oh end bee filled with sea bass shrimp & sardeenz ♥

    1. That would sure be grand
      A movie starring the cat shown across the land

  18. Zombies and cats
    By the great poet
    The Pat in the Hatt

  19. Computers sure do come in handy
    When Alex is showing his bad ass candy

  20. Aww, yeah. That is good stuff and so fitting for me to read today. Last night I watched old (new to me) episodes of the Walking Dead when I shouldn't have and wouldn't if I weren't so tempted to be scared.

    1. haha the walking dead is a great show
      Watch it when new with each zombie foe

  21. A voice stealing zombie!? I though only Ursula could swipe voices?

  22. More zombies, eh? How about some vampires? lol

    1. Vampires suck blood
      My ocd would give them a thud

  23. I was hoping for out of the park
    When Brian swung at the zombie lark
    What Anne did with her shoe
    Was hero work true blue

    1. Anne made it dead
      What one can do with a shoe tread

  24. Everyone is so busy!
    Makes me kind of dizzy! ha.

  25. I'm starting to wonder what you're smoking Pat.
    Yet all these years of following your blog, I'm just now wondering that?
    Yeah, I'm a little low sometimes
    But tell me, are you doing lines?
    Your stories go all over town
    But never do they bring a frown.
    It must be good stuff
    Pass it over. I want some, & you've had enough.

    1. lol I'll never tell
      Clear as a bell
      All because of my magic elixer
      It sure is a fixer
      Can make the cat see with a third eye
      Or Pat is the cat and just a crazy guy

  26. HAHA, I wrote "low" instead of "slow", cuz that's how slow I am, and I'm low too, low to the ground. It's true.

    1. Low and slow
      Don't stub a toe
      But high and fast
      Just don't last lol

  27. losing a voice

    is never a choice

  28. Not sure how much I am liking these zombies.

  29. A zombie shrimp
    Who hops up asses
    I hope he hangs on
    When it passes

  30. LOL. You are brave to post this rhyme. Cats always know how to have a good time. The search engine wingnuts will find you now. Good thing you like to use them for more pow!

    1. Yeah it works for us
      They can find and we will let them cuss

  31. Trudessa covered in zombie goo... That is just down right gross...


Post a Comment