Ever The Cheap Kinda Creep!

The cat watched some things arrive here and there. I saw them easily at my lair. They were packaged good except for a few. Why? Because a great deal came due.

Wrapped and ready.
Shipment come steady.
It's almost there.
But buyer beware.

While established is grand,
Across most of the land.
In comes the cheap,
The cheap kinda creep.

Have a great deal.
A real steal.
You save some dough.
How is it so low?

Why we skimp on shipping.
Your liquid is dripping.
Your glass is smashed.
It all needs to be trashed.

Better shipping at the dump.
But don't be a grump.
Because you got a deal.
It was such a steal.

Sorry, no refund allowed.
But you can stand proud.
You just saved money.
That makes all sunny.

See our auto reply?
Don't sit and sigh.
We are too busy for you.
That's all that will come through.

The touch of cheap.
A lazy hop not leap.
Who needs the hassle?
We don't live in a castle.

You got it at cost.
The shipping was tossed.
Tossed and flipped.
You never even tipped.

So enjoy the pieces.
It was for your nieces?
Our reply robot feels your pain.
Hey, we also ship by plane.

That just popped out as I saw such packages about. How can anyone get repeat business with such crap? Their packing looks like it has the clap. Ever get bad packages like that where you are at? Did they spill, break or smash like glass? That would sure annoy the hell out of my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.


  1. Replies
    1. The crowd dispersed just as fast
      Early risers will make it just!


    2. Back to the top
      The crowd did flop

    3. Good morning True
      Starting the day, nicely too!


    4. Afternoon now
      Or evening somehow

  2. Ever The Cheap Kinda Creep!
    They will still need to keep
    A low profile
    All the while
    Lest their troubles end in heaps


    1. Low profile they keep
      Throwing more on the heap

  3. I remember one that arrived beat all to heck, paper torn, holes in it. By some miracle, the item inside was still intact.

    1. That is at least a win
      Getting what you want within

  4. That has happened to me, an item arrived broke. Then I returned it to the local store and had to wait in line. So much for buying on line to save time. One big hassle.

    Inquiring minds want to know. Why does the mail person insist on stuffing envelopes in a mailbox that says fragile? I have ordered books that he stuffs in there :(

    1. If it doesn't say do not bend
      Then he can stuff it in, no matter what you send
      That is the rule
      One big hassle is not cool

  5. Cheaper is not always better. If it's going UPS, it better be wrapped really good. (I used to work for UPS and I'll never forget coming in to work through the warehouse and seeing packages fall from the conveyor belts.)

    1. Blah, that sure wouldn't make you confident in those guys
      I know with other places the packages also flies

  6. Years ago a package arrived all in tatters
    With the contents all broken and scattered.
    Post office was not of much help
    When trying to settle the matter.


    1. They usually won't be
      As long as it got to thee

  7. Packages or a mailing box
    Sly and sneaky like a fox
    How they'll arrive, you'll never guess
    Be on the look-out, I confess

  8. this shipping
    spills anything
    after such treat
    no orders to fit

  9. A few years ago a packaged came
    Stained with oil and mangled with shame
    The contents had been carefully wrapped
    With plastic not easily snapped
    Safe inside was my huge bargain
    Which made me think I could keep on chargin'

    1. the outside may look frail
      But the inside is good as it hit the trail
      A win indeed
      Just wash your hands after opening at your feed

  10. If I order almost anything online, if the shipping ain't free I ain't buying it.

  11. Most of the time my mail arrives okay
    But one time a book was so shredded I wondered what happened on its way.

  12. I've never had anything that Amazon shipped me be broken. Sometimes their packaging is excessive, but I guess it works.

    1. Excessive beats the other way
      And having to replay

  13. Oh so true.
    Can make you blue.
    If they don't wrap with care,
    then buyer beware!

    1. Beware the first
      Know the worst
      The stray away
      Any old day

  14. A few weeks ago, we bought a new base for our patio umbrella. It's a big, heavy item. It arrived from Amazon completely cracked in half. They gave me no trouble about returning it, but I couldn't pick the thing up, so had to send my husband to the UPS store to ship it back.

    1. lol sure a pain in the ass
      Literally maybe when it has a huge mass

  15. Use Samsonite. Then the gorillas can't dent or scratch
    Funny rhyme

    1. Sure can be the way
      No gorillas can come to play

  16. Fortunately I've been lucky, Pat. I can't remember the last time I had a package arrive badly wrapped or with its contents damaged. I have noticed over time how much many goods have been cheapened, like the thickness and quality of paper, or the thinner materials and poorer construction in the exact same item of clothing, smaller amounts of food in the same-sized box but up in price ... It really irritates me. Fun run with your rhyme today, Pat!

    Almost finished "Delivered" where I'm at. There is a lot of you in that book. When Cassie and Orlin died, I shook! The real monsters are definitely scary. I was born in Kings County and have been to Haliwater many times, also Hunts Bay; and, I know there is crime, it just hasn't touched my life in that part of the world. I did see a home in Haliwater in the summer of 2016 that had been firebombed for revenge by a gang, and that rattled my idealistic view of the place. I really curious to see how your book ends. Still hoping a certain bad step-brother gets his due! Now I have another meaning for "facilitator." It reminds me of when I asked my class if anyone knew another meaning for "cereal," and a little second grader shouted out proudly, "Serial, like serial killer!" I'm continuing to enjoy Martin, Emma, and the kiddos very much! The parents have a different approach to parenting; but they're a united front, and they have definite, strong values that they're teaching their children. "Delivered" has been a fun, fast read so far!

    1. Yeah, stupid smaller packages yet the same price
      I wish those who do that would get lice
      All one big cash grab from sea to sea
      Making things as cheap as can be

      lol Cassie and Orlin are still alive
      Just knocked them out with food, so they survive
      The best fiction nears the truth I suppose
      Or something like that they say as the wind blows
      So put much in
      Figured it would work better with my first person spin
      I mixed and matched names of places nearby
      Knew you'd get them on the fly
      Yep, real monsters lurk about
      Not letting any know with a scream or shout
      One facilitator no one wants to know
      lol at least they knew another serial in tow
      Glad it is enjoyed too
      Sure flying through it at your zoo
      Marvin may get it in the end
      Have to see how it goes around the bend
      Different indeed
      No maymbe paymbe crap at their feed lol

    2. Spoiler alert, I haven't read it yet.,.

    3. Oh, I knew that Cassie and Orlin were still alive, I just didn't want to soften the shock with a spoiler! LOL

    4. lol whoopsy to that
      Shame on the cat

  17. Recently, the USPS damaged a $175 comic book I mailed to an eBay buyer. I returned the payment to my buyer, and filed an insurance claim with the post office. I was one of the lucky ones. The USPS promptly processed my insurance claim and sent me a money order right away... so I got my money after all, and got to keep the book besides!

    1. There is a win win
      Although a pain at your bin
      But still can resell, if even for less
      Make some more dough out of the mess

    2. I just knew the same had happened to you, Mr. Silver Fox. Damaged books! A damaged omnibus is what I got the other day after waiting for three frigging months.

    3. Damn, that is a long time
      Such a crime

  18. Oh, we get lots of stuff packed on the cheap and UPS teies its best to deatroy it anyways!

    1. lol they can do a damn fine job
      Blame poor old Bob

  19. Save while you spend
    There is no end!
    Spend, spend, spend til you have no more
    But think of all you'll have saved
    You won't feel so poor.

    1. Won't feel it until the bills come due
      Then you may feel it sticking like glue

  20. orlin N cassie; ewe betcha....N what we like iz wear de hellz de rest oh de order kinda order that ya could drive ta pick up yur self what de sam hell ya ordered faster N how de order getz ther....ore when it sayz shipz in two dayz N it setz in de hub for two weekz....guezz we R knot de onlee onez with "math" izzuez ~~~~~~ ☺☺♥♥

    1. lol nope, they sure can't count
      Easier to get it yourself unless it costs a way higher amount

  21. Sometimes I didn't received some books I bought online :(
    but Amazon always refund me !!
    ebay sometimes..

    1. Ebay can be more of a pain
      rather avoid their lane

    2. yes and are the only doesnt refund soon. Seriously I think in not but more in Ebay.
      the best is amazon .

    3. Amazon does seem to have their act together
      Many a storm they can weather

  22. We just got a piece of furniture that needed assembled. It had been tossed around in shipping and it was so cheaply packaged that it didn't make it without at least a fifth of the pieces being broken beyond repair. That's a huge thing to ship back for another!! I'm working on contacting someone higher up for a better option. -_-

    1. Ugg, that would be a big pain in the ass
      Hopefully something easier comes to pass

  23. Some items are actually well packaged, I blame the overzealous delivery men who throw stuff around in their vans and end up damaging the goods.

  24. I sent my sister a shirt in a manila envelope which is the way I ship most of my non-breakables. What arrived was the labels. No envelope, no shirt.

    1. lol maybe someone liked the shirt
      And around the law they did skirt

  25. She wouldn’t say husband was cheap
    He just had a budget to keep
    Don’t laugh and be still
    She now calls him Will
    ‘cause when he hears Bill how he’d weep

  26. No bad packaging but a delivery man who left in sit out in the rain without even knocking on the door to let us know. Hate taking to the robo-return thingy.

    1. The robo return is a pain
      Can drive one insane

  27. I get the opposite. Stuff is usually packaged so well, I need a pick axe, a blow torch, and a bomb to get it opened.

    1. lol well at least you get there
      Unless you harm it with that bomb at your lair

  28. Once I bought clothing for a so-called bargain from this company as a first-time customer. That was my last time buying anything from the company. The clothes didn't fit and the shipping I paid to send the merchandise back cost about as much as the "refund" I was getting back!

    1. Damn, sounds like one to avoid forever
      Sure a costly endeavor


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