An Old One Eyed Granny View For Whoopdi Friggin Doo!

Are we trying to scare viewer's away? Who let her get on display? Didn't the camera break? How much more of this can I take? I think I need to sit down. Robbie Raisin may give her the cyclops crown.

Elsie Amata's
Whoopdi Friggin Doo

What will she do not to scare? Will she show a wig full of shiny hair?

For a minute I thought you were talking about me
But than I thought, "No, that couldn't be."
The cat wouldn't be that dumb
unless he wants to live on the run
from my big dangerous dogs
who would lick him into a fog!


So you are going to lick a cat? Wow, cat videos sure are where it is at.

Or they are amazed by my beauty
and think, "Wow! What a cutie!"
Then they ask if I'm a princess
but then I have to confess
that I am just Elsie Amata
a pretty, littler Long Islander (when I say it, it rhymes) 


A fake rhyme and a cute chime. Does it still hold for a one eyed mime?

It scares our dogs too
Not much we can do
To make people around here stop
unless we want to call a cop
but than we'd have a neighbor war
and a bag of poop would be flung at our door
Illegal or not they're here to stay
no matter what the holiday


So you have one eyed neighbors as well? Damn, you are in hippie heaven where you dwell.

I LOVE this kind of talk
it puts a bounce in my walk
a smile upon face
and it's sure to be your saving grace!


Guess you love the one eye remarks. Or maybe dog barks.

Of course you would go ahead and brag
While leaving me lying next to some Canadian hag
who wiped me clean of all the food and wine
then can't drive and causes a traffic line
thanks for ruining my summer fun
now I just to go and run!


You may alienate our Canadian viewers with that. They may get pitchforks after a spat.

Well, I'm still really grumpy from yesterday and I had to hold off on doing a ranting post about it so I wish I had 25% more of my damn income. I wish I didn't pay so much in taxes. Stupid IRS. You know there's a post coming....

Sorry, you only get one go. Whoopdi Friggin Doo doesn't do repeats posts or pay the IRS any dough.

That is why I love the sea
Even if someone pees
it is quickly washed away
so I can still swim and play!
Just wish it wasn't crowded with folks
maybe you can scare them with your jokes?


Can't you just give them the evil one eye? Then away them and their pee would fly.

I'm guilty of misspelled and dropped words
Because I type so fast, like the wings on a bird.
Maybe one day I'll slow down,
but everything moves fast in my town.


So bad spelling keeps them there? Slow down? Do we want to know while on air?

I understand loving my shampoo
Those soapy suds really do
make my hair healthy and shine
ain't no way I'm giving up mine!


You sure have a thing with hair. I guess you need it to cover your one eyed affair.

Are you sure that was a random scroll?
I could have written that summer droll.
I'm so tired of snow and rain
it's becoming one big pain!
I can't wait to be back on the beach
and summer is almost within my reach!
I'll even bring along some nachos and beer
I don't care what it does to my fine rear!


Give us that rear shot to end the day. That may take the scary away. Did I really just ask to see a cyclops's ass on air? I think this syndication thing is really becoming a weird affair.

***********************

Old One Eyed Granny sure goes on about her hair and the giant litter box a lot. She even has a Canadian ridding plot. Maybe they'll have to lock her in a tower. Then no one else will cower. It has lots of stairs for her to climb at least. She could be a reverse beast. On that movie we'd take a pass. It would probably scare my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Comments

  1. Loved the poetry in this post Pat,
    Thought the title was about me... how apt.
    Had a good chuckle along the way.
    Setting me up for a good day.

    Yvonne.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This comment has been removed by the author.

      Delete
    2. Time to put Hank's picture on a milk carton

      Delete
    3. Glad it was grand
      Here in our land

      Do they even do that any more
      At any shore?

      Delete
  2. As much as she loves her beach you'd think she'd not pee in the sea.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh, it's full moon time again?!?!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I recall wading in the ocean with my friend. I told him I found a warm spot and he said he just peed...I splashed him in disgust and swam away. As for licking a cat, one can buy a rubber tongue to do just that

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahaha at least he made you warm
      Rubber tongue should be the norm

      Delete
  5. funny batch of comments and I could hear the rhyme in her name and Long Islander...it works.

    ReplyDelete
  6. You can try to make me mad
    but I've been playing in the sand
    and hanging out with family
    which always makes me happy.
    Plus my hair is looking gorgeous these days
    must be all that sun shining at my bay
    and knowing the tourists will leaving straight away
    to go back to their wherever they stay.
    Oh and one more thing evil cat,
    the war is on, choke on that!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Your one eyed group
      Got let out of the coop?
      No wonder the tourists are running away
      Your hair can't hide that display
      Although many New Yorkers our way
      Take them back we say
      I'll hawk up a hairball instead
      Watch that hair on your head

      Delete
  7. I laughed and laughed and laughed, a great way to start the day.
    I can always use a little fun and humor here at my bay.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fun and humor is grand
      We enjoy it in our land

      Delete
  8. The shampoo post I must have missed
    Surely would have been a typing workout for my wrist

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Been down many a road
      Maybe even a shampoo load

      Delete
  9. I love Elsie one of my best frienda and a lovely and brave lady !!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Being so nice to her
      Geez, the cat can't purr lol

      Delete
  10. Now not going to the see
    if there will be pee
    don't care if it washes away
    in it I don't want to play

    betty

    ReplyDelete
  11. One Eyed Granny View for a Whoopi Do
    And looking for shinny hair for a view
    With lots of humor
    Without much endevor
    Fun and games with family always on cue

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
  12. the sea rhyme is hilarious; makes one wonder what the ocean dwellers think tho !!!!! :) ☺☺♥♥

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, they may think all are nuts
      As they stare at butts

      Delete
  13. Another fine rhymer. Sorry this series will be wrapping up soon.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Only a week to go
      And back to the whatever flow

      Delete
  14. Replies
    1. One eye all around
      Long time she has been found

      Delete
  15. My daughter claims everyone pees in the sea, but not me. That’s just gross.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha well when you gotta go
      Can't say I recall peeing in the sea though

      Delete
  16. I felt like a dude dancing with a farmer's daughter
    At a local barn dance where I wasn't drinking water.

    Whatever that means.

    Arlee Bird
    Tossing It Out

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. All drunk and in a funk
      Don't fall and go kerplunk

      Delete
  17. Well, I'm still really grumpy from yesterday and I had to hold off on doing a ranting post about it so I wish I had 25% more of my damn income. I wish I didn't pay so much in taxes. Stupid IRS. You know there's a post coming....

    It's official. Elsie is my twin!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha a grumpy goo
      Have to wait for the post to see what got into you
      Yeah, they take so much of the dough
      Wish they'd take their taxes and shove them..you know

      Delete
    2. She was real grumpy
      Maybe even jumpy
      She talked about the IRS
      Always a big mess
      Paying too much taxes at her bin
      Where to begin?
      She's a grumpy Goo!
      Beat being Scooby Doo...

      Delete
    3. haha grumpy times two
      Whatever will you do

      Delete
  18. I don't think I know Elsie. Thanks for the info. :)
    ~Jess

    ReplyDelete
  19. I'm really afraid of the Evil Eye. Gives me nightmares to think about it.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment