Time For A Scare?

So Jax wanted to get with the cat and give scary movies a go. After she said that, Pat and I both gave an eye roll though. How are humans scared of fake stuff? I can see jump scares or scaring the tiny humans, but aren't the big ugly humans supposed to have a brain? Is a script scary?

I don't know about you humans, but we'll still play with Raviolis and Waterworks today.


So you have a guy that has a knife and you have big guns but you can't stop him because....because...he has a face mask? Is the face mask magic? Is that why he has so many different timelines now? That is just scary to think about as it hurts the head. See? A scary movie.


Here we have one that spawned 50 sequels. No one better than the other. Worse maybe. What is scary is how easily this could have been over. Gun. Check! Lock. Check! Gun to lock to try and get it off...anyone? Anyone? Nope. Let's saw our limb off instead. Scary!!!


Time to cheat. The ultimate cheat. Then create 50 more sequels where you cheat some more. But you know the world doesn't like cheaters, so you have to pay for that. You cheat. You die. That ought to put a stop to a lot of crime. I guess that would make it scary.


Let's play dress up and be a cat. What could go wrong? Let's lick ourselves and huff catnip. What could go wrong? Maybe it is more scary to ask what is right about this one.


Nature wants to eat humans. Or get rid of them. Or...I don't know. Make humans stare for two hours. Staring. Staring. Staring. Staring. Silence. More Staring. Oh so scary.


What timeline is this? What sequel is this? Is it a prequel? Is it a redo? Is it the same Sarah Conner? Did she shrink? Is he human or robot? Is this a reboot? What timeline are we in now? I know I asked that but I feel like Skynet shifted it. Oh. Skynet didn't die yet. That other thingy is later. Or is it before? F-ing time travel. Scary!


I'm on vacation. I'm on vacation. I'm on vacation. No you are not, you idiot. You went there with a purpose that wasn't to relax. You aren't on vacation so shut the hell up. Better yet, just shoot this franchise and throw what remains in the incinerator. At this point it is scary just seeing how low it has sunk. 


Thank you for being a friend...except to this guy. Go back to the Golden Girls. Leave the scary criminals to Rambo so he can rip off Home Alone after getting beat up. Hmmm maybe you should have been there. Could be scary either way.


Doesn't this just scream scary? No? Yes? Need I say more? Probably not, but that never stopped me before. Kindergarten Cop he's not. But it is probably ahead of the recent sequel to that, so that is scary. 


Oh. We are back to really scary. I mean look at his face. It is so scary. Those trolls aren't to be messed with. You could call this Troll 6. Or would that be 4? Maybe Critters 6? Don't remind me of the 5th one of that. Hell, forget 3 and 4. Maybe Ernest needs to take the trolls to school or Africa to play with the Critters. That would be a slamdunk. The kiddos will go to camp with this one.

Is it scary that I've watched all of these? Probably. Hey, the first wasn't bad when you forget the whole timeline thing and he killed her how many times now? Final Destination was interesting the first time, after the 5th sequel with the exact same thing, it gets old though. And Ernest beats the rest. Oh how the mighty have fallen and just don't know it.

Any movies that actually scare you? Any scare you when you were a tiny human at your zoo? Like how I switch to rhyme and then not? Hey, it can be a part of the plot. Or at least make you think. May bring you to the brink. See any truly time wasters lately? Not sure how some of such crap gets made, but it does. And then all it gets is crappy buzz. See any of the above? Now I am done. Wasn't that great? Were you expecting me to say fun? I enjoy screwing with all a t...bunch. And now this oh so scary movie post has come to pass from my off and on little rhyming ass.

Enjoy life, forget the strife.

Comments

  1. Time For A Scare?
    Not rightly being fair
    What a scream
    Not in a dream
    Nor fake stuff for a dare

    Hank

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  2. Yes, it is scary you've seen some of those movies.
    No movie scares me. Reality is far more terrifying.

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    1. Yep. Reality is far more scary. Movies are just meh as far as scares go. Whoopi.

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  3. Hahahaha. The Happening made me lol because I love Mark Wahlberg so I was really excited for it, only to be let down. That was the dumbest movie ever and the ending was even worse. Most of these I haven’t seen but it looks like we had two that match. And lmao @ Ernest!!! I forgot about that guy. For shammeee.. I must introduce my daughter to his movies. She’d love him.

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    1. Yep. The Happening was one of the dumbest movies ever indeed. Can't believe I watched it all the way through. Ugg. Ernest was a favorite as a kid. She should enjoy him indeed. Ernest Goes To Africa was the one that really stunk.

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  4. I don't like scary movies too much. Thanks for letting me know what not to watch.

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  5. I love your picks. There are many on your list that I've watched. The Happening is definitely scary because nature should hunt us down and might one day. The first scary movie I saw as a kid was The Blob. It was in my nightmares for a month. Recently, I watched it again and laughed a lot. I bought the Ernest movies for my kiddos. I even liked them.

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    1. haha I always laughed at scary movies even as a kid. Think Demons was one of the first I watched. The Ernest movies had their perks.

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  6. That Catwoman is scary for all the wrong reasons...

    How's life, Cat?

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    1. That it is. Life is same old crap different day.

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  7. I don't think I've seen any of them. I usually avoid scary movies not because they scare me but some of the plots are just so unreal I can't sit through them :)

    betty

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    1. Yep. They are soooooooo dumb with many of the plots. Killer could be dead in five seconds.

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  8. We sort of agree with Alex, the daily news really scares us!

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  9. I've heard Catwoman was scary bad but I've never had the guts to watch it.

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    1. I only saw bits in parts in the background. That was enough

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  10. I’m not a scary movie watcher, but I think if I sat next to you while you critiqued the film, I’d enjoy it! 😂 I’ve seen parts of Halloween and the nicest thing I can say about it is that it does capture that era quite nicely!

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    1. lol you wouldn't be scared as I sat there and pointed out all the stupidness of it. But which Halloween. There are like 3 first ones and 500 sequels.

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    2. Just the original one. 1978. If it was rated R, I was too young to see it then!

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    3. Gotta love when you get to see them young and scare yourself

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  11. dood....itz all most scaree moovee ree veew time heer in trout towne two; may bee copee N paste will help out thiz yeer tho ;)

    de gurl said de onlee moovee that her did knot like at all waz... eggz ore sist....her saw it when her waz bout 16..... N doez knot wanna see a ree run ~~~~

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    1. haha copy and paste keeps you going.

      I remember watching that as a kid. Was meh to me.

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  12. Gremlin was out when I was little and it scared me a lot back then!

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  13. Movies don't scare me these days, but when I was little A Nightmare on Elm Street, Friday the 13th, Critters, Gremlins, Poltergeist, Children of the Corn, Hellraiser, and The Exorcist were some that kept me up late at night.

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    1. You sure hit them all. Critters were more fun to me. And Gremlins of course.

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    2. Going back and watching them now though, my gosh they are so cheesy! LOL

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    3. lol yeah. They are super cheesy. Most usually are or at least end up that way.

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  14. I have seen Halloween, the first one and it was scary but I get scared easily. Final Destination scared the hell out of me but I haven’t seen any of the sequels. I haven’t seen the others you talked about and won’t. Most of the time, sequels aren’t needed...like the Matrix. The Shining scared me and The Ring....ughhh I hate that kid coming out of the TV. As for Catwoman, I have 3 and the one, a boy...Kaspar, decided to smurgle on my left side at 3am with his claws. The other weird thing he does is he ...um....does a little F$*#y wucky...strange cat.

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    1. Yep. Matrix never needed one indeed. Now there is a 4th coming. Pffft. hahaha well he has to get a thrill somewhere I guess.

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  15. I love the terminator movies. Other scary stuff are not my cup of tea. Hope you are keeping warm. Wow, so many books :-O

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    1. Warming out the storm. First 2 terminator movies are all I really liked. Many indeed.

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  16. I've been scared of horror movies since middle school when my BFF and her family convinced me to watch My Bloody Valentine. I don't even remember anything in the movie, but I do remember not liking it AT ALL. And they watched in the dark. Phft. Now that I've read this post, I'm reminded of how 'scary' it is that any Die Hard movie after the first one was really not so great (and that's an understatement).

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    1. haha well it is good that you don't remember anything specific to make you scared I suppose. Yep, they just got crappier and crappier.

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  17. Scary movies don’t settle well with me, I have enough scary in my everyday life.

    Final Destination creeped me out! I mean, it seems that happens sometimes in life.

    Now, the cat is giving us a bit
    of sass with his ass... oops that was just crass



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    1. Bah, just are what they are. If death wants to play it will find a way haha crass with sass

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  18. I love scary movies and the only ones that have scared me recently were the Insidious movies.

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  19. Fun post. My kids loved Ernest movies growing up, especially Scared Stupid. Looks like you've got quite the movie collection. Hope you got some rest this weekend.

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    1. The Ernest movies were a hit here too. Relaxed away indeed at our bay.

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  20. Reading the Exorcist scared me so badly I would not and have never seen the movie. Halloween - oh yeah, one of my favorite movies.
    Poltergeist - another one I found frightening.
    Night of the Living Dead - the absolute scariest of all!
    Can't judge the more modern - I can no longer watch them - too gory!
    Happy October!

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    1. Night of the Living Dead is a good one indeed. Lots of modern ones suck

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  21. Is cat scared of Cat Woman? I don't watch scary movies because I'm a big chicken. Scared Stupid is probably the only scary movie I'd watch.

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  22. I just rewatched Paranormal Activity Four last weekend. Maybe it was three. I have no idea. There are about fifty of them. It still made me jump and it still made me aggravated by the ending but, that's okay, I still enjoy the scares. Oh, and now I have the Golden Girls' theme song in my head. Thanks a lot, evil cat!

    Warmly,
    Elsie

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    1. Yeah, there is like 50,000 of those. Think I only watched the first. haha the cat is proud of that. Golden Girls for the win.

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  23. The cats and I liked Cat Woman. Grin.

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  24. I get irritated with so many of the horror flicks. A lot of those people are candidates for the Darwinian Award.

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  25. Why she wants to see scared movies ?? I don like so much . The twins still love scared movies and they see again and again. They love them 😳😳😳

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  26. Life is scary enough; I don’t need more fright in my life. Ha ha! That said, I may have seen Stop or My Mom Will Shoot back when it first came out, but don’t remember anything about it if I did. That may not be a bad thing...

    We watch League of Extraordinary Gentleman each October and enjoy it thoroughly. While Lizard was recuperating, we rented a few movies online, which we had NEVER done before, and that was kind of fun, plus a great way to pretend we were going on a date. Unbelievably enjoyed Red, Red II, Passengers, Ender’s Game, Europa Report and one other I can’t remember the name of... darn!

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    1. Red and Red 2 were fun ones. And yeah, life is scary enough. Don't need anything else to add to it. Be glad you forgot that one too.

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  27. Okay, some cat ate my comment! It is not here. I suspect you, Orlin, because Cassie is too sweet and you're a rapscallion! I don't do horror shows. I'm too imaginative and highly strung. I'm not as bad as my sister Donnie though. She's been known to get down on a movie theatre floor and hide during scary movies.

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    1. The cat can shoulder the blame lol wow, that is extreme haha be super funny to watch her hide

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